Alphonse Allais quotes

Alphonse Allais quotes

last updated: November 28, 2023

“Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank.”
-- Alphonse Allais

#Coffee Quotes #Sleep Quotes #Beverages Quotes
“Statistics have shown that mortality increases perceptibly in the military during wartime.”
-- Alphonse Allais

#Military Quotes #Statistics Quotes #Mortality Quotes

“And so taking the long way home through the market I slow my pace down. It doesn't come naturally. My legs are programmed to trot briskly and my arms to pump up and down like pistons, but I force myself to stroll past the stalls and pavement cafes. To enjoy just being somewhere, rather than rushing from somewhere, to somewhere. Inhaling deep lungfuls of air, instead of my usual shallow breaths. I take a moment to just stop and look around me. And smile to myself. For the first time in a long time, I can, quite literally, smell the coffee.”
“Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank.”
“But [Pooh] couldn't sleep. The more he tried to sleep the more he couldn't. He tried counting Sheep, which is sometimes a good way of getting to sleep, and, as that was no good, he tried counting Heffalumps. And that was worse. Because every Heffalump that he counted was making straight for a pot of Pooh's honey, and eating it all. For some minutes he lay there miserably, but when the five hundred and eighty-seventh Heffalump was licking its jaws, and saying to itself, "Very good honey this, I don't know when I've tasted better," Pooh could bear it no longer.”
“Dream is not that which you see while sleeping it is something that does not let you sleep.”
“I could not sleep when I got on such a hunt for an idea until I had caught it; ...This was a kind of passion with me, and it has stuck by me; for I am never easy now, when I am handling a thought, till I have bounded it north, and bounded it south, and bounded it east, and bounded it west.”
“I eat, sleep, and drink my character. It is my fantasy to go to another planet.”

Source : "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.
“They think my life is glamourous. It's not true. I obviously get to come in and do radio interviews. That's the glamour. But other than that, I eat and sleep and that's it. Eat, sleep and do shows.”
“Americans may be drinking fewer alcoholic beverages, but they are certainly eating more of them than ever before. Wittingly or un.”
“I definitely think we should not serve alcoholic beverages at the lunch break.”
“Why, this Satan’s drink is so delicious it would be a pity to let the infidels have exclusive use of it. We shall fool Satan by baptizing it and making it a truly Christian beverage.”

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