Carolyn Heilbrun quotes

  • A literary academic can no more pass a bookstore than an alcoholic can pass a bar.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Inspirational #Humorous #Book

  • Power consists to a large extent in deciding what stories will be told.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Stories

  • Ideas move fast when their time comes.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Moving #Ideas

  • The married are those who have taken the terrible risk of intimacy and, having taken it, know life without intimacy to be impossible.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Taken #Risk #Impossible

  • Ironically, women who acquire power are more likely to be criticized for it than are the men who have always had it.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Sisterhood #Men #He Man

  • Ardent, intelligent, sweet, sensitive, cultivated, erudite. These are the adjectives of praise in an androgynous world. Those who consider them epithets of shame or folly ought not to be trusted with leadership, for they will be men hot for power and revenge, certain of right and wrong.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Leadership #Sweet #Revenge

  • The journey is over. Love to all.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Journey

  • To recommend that women become identical to men, would be simple reversal, and would defeat the whole point of androgyny, and for that matter, feminism: in both, the whole point is choice.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Simple #Men #Choices

  • Today's youth seem finally to have understood that only by freeing woman from her exclusively sexual role can man free himself from his ordained role in the rat-race: that of the rat.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Men #Race #Understanding

  • One hires lawyers as on hires plumbers, because one wants to keep one's hands off the beastly drains.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Hands #Law #Want

  • Odd, the years it took to learn one simple fact: that the prize just ahead, the next job, publication, love affair, marriage always seemed to hold the key to satisfaction but never, in the longer run, sufficed.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Running #Jobs #Simple

  • Whether animals admit it or not, they and I communicate,
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Animal #Communicate

  • The rare, delicate flavor of a life after retiring in one's sixties, whatever one has "retired" from, the pleasure I experienced beyond my job at Columbia, is a gift of life in the last decades. but it is not easily learned. . . . But sometimes, the only way to live is to get out, or at least seriously to contemplate getting out, doing the impossible,flinging the conventional tea.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Jobs #Tea #Flavor

  • Nostalgia is a dangerous emotion, both because it is powerless to act in the real world, and because it glides so easily into hatred and resentment against those who have taken our Eden from us.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Real #Taken #Eden

  • Upon becoming fifty the one thing you can't afford is habit.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Age #Fifty #Becoming

  • A dog is the only exercise machine you cannot decide to skip when you don't feel like it.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Fitness #Dog #Exercise

  • a revolutionary marriage ... [is] one in which both partners have work at the center of their lives and must find a delicate balance that can support both together and each individually.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Marriage #Support #Balance

  • The sign of a good marriage is that everything is debatable and challenged; nothing is turned into law or policy. The rules, if any, are known only to the two players, who seek no public trophies.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Marriage #Player #Law

  • Only a marriage with partners strong enough to risk divorce is strong enough to avoid it.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Marriage #Strong #Divorce

  • Women, I believe, search for fellow beings who have faced similar struggles, conveyed them in ways a reader can transform into her own life, confirmed desires the reader had hardly acknowledge-desires that now seem possible. Women catch courage from the women whose lives and writings they read, and women call the bearer of that courage friend. [p. 138]
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Believe #Struggle #Writing

  • Androgyny suggests a spirit of reconciliation between the sexes; it suggests, further, a full range of experience…it suggests a spectrum upon which human beings choose their places without regard to propriety or custom.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Sex #Spirit #Androgyny

  • Quoting, like smoking, is a dirty habit to which I am devoted.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Dirty #Marijuana #Naughty

  • Professors of literature collect books the way a ship collects barnacles, without seeming effort.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Book #Effort #Way

  • We women have lived too much with closure: "If he notices me, if I marry him, if I get into college, if I get this work accepted, if I get this job" -- there always seems to loom the possibility of something being over, settled, sweeping clear the way for contentment. This is the delusion of a passive life. When the hope for closure is abandoned, when there is an end to fantasy, adventure for women will begin.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Jobs #Adventure #College

  • We in middle age require adventure.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Adventure #Age #Funny Travel

  • That is the point of quotations. One can use another's words to be insulting.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Insulting #Use #Quotations

  • Whether deliberately, unconsciously or accidentally, she seems to have composed her own life so that its fitful, rudderless, and self-doubting first half was alchemized into gold when the austere bluestocking became the fallen woman.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Life #Self #Doubt

  • You can flush my ashes down the toilet, for all I care.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Ashes #Toilets #Care

  • As long as women are isolated one from the other, not allowed to offer other women the most personal accounts of their lives, they will not be part of any narratives of their own…women will be staving off destiny and not inviting or inventing or controlling it.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Destiny #Long #Narrative

  • Power is the ability to take one's place in whatever discourse is essential to action and the right to have one's part matter.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Matter #Essentials #Action

  • I don't know why togetherness was ever held up as an ideal of marriage. Away from home for both, then together, that's much better.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Home #Single Life #Together

  • Thinking about profound social change, conservatives always expect disaster, while revolutionaries confidently anticipate utopia. Both are wrong.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Thinking #Profound #Revolutionary

  • Normal is absolutely my least favorite word.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Serious #Normal

  • Today's shocks are tomorrow's conventions.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Today #Tomorrow #Conventions

  • the term 'androgyny' ... defines a condition under which the characteristics of the sexes, and the human impulses expressed by men and women, are not rigidly assigned. Androgyny seeks to liberate the individual from the confines of the appropriate.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Sex #Men #Individual

  • Androgyny suggests a spirit of reconciliation between the sexes ...
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Sex #Spirit #Gender

  • The compulsion to find a lover and husband in a single person has doomed more women to misery than any other illusion.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Marriage #Husband #Lovers

  • Male friends do not always face each other; they stand side by side, facing the world.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Friends #Men #Males

  • Why do long marriages occasionally endow their inhabitants with a rare kind of equilibrium otherwise almost unknown in human relations? My guess is that the value of the moment has at last overshadowed the long history of resentments, betrayals, and boredom.
    -- Carolyn Heilbrun

    #Marriage #Betrayal #Long