Funny Drinking quotes

The reason I drink is because when I'm sober I think I'm Eddie Fisher.
-- Dean Martin

#Thinking #Funny Drinking #Sober
Not everyone who drinks is a poet. Some of us drink because we're not poets.
-- Dudley Moore

#Drinking #Funny Drinking #Drink
There is no bad whiskey. There are only some whiskeys that aren't as good as others.
-- Raymond Chandler

#Drinking #Funny Drinking #Whiskey
If I had to live my life over, I'd live over a saloon.
-- W. C. Fields

#Drinking #Funny Drinking #Living My Life
The British government has urged its citizens to abstain from alcohol at least two days a week. Or to make it easier to remember, whenever they brush their teeth.
-- Conan O'Brien

#Government #Two #Funny Drinking
A good heavy book holds you down. It's an anchor that keeps you from getting up and having another gin and tonic.
-- Roy Blount, Jr.

#Book #Anchors #Funny Drinking

We live in the best of all possible worlds
Sometimes, niÃ±a, our greatest gifts grow from what we are not given.
The fact that you are even here, alive, on this planet is a mathematical miracle, and you should not spend the time that you have being busy being miserable.
Capitalism arose and took off its pajamas. Another day, another dollar. Each man is valued at what he will bring in the marketplace. Meaning has been drained from work and assigned instead to remuneration.
We live in a society where manhood is all about conquering and violence. And what we don't realize is that ultimately that kind of manhood ultimately kills you.
To see a world in a grain of sand and heaven in a wild flower Hold infinity in the palms of your hand and eternity in an hour.
Yes, ruling by fooling, is a great British art with great Irish fools to practice on.
You know, I can get kind of spunky or I can get tough, you know, that kind of tough, sexy look. But sexy? No, I don't think so.
The only time "early bloomer" has ever been applied to me is vis-a-vis my premature apprehension of the deep dread-of-existence thing. In all other cases, I plod and tromp along. My knuckles? Well dragged.
I act for free, but I demand a huge salary as compensation for all the annoyance of being a public personality. In that sense, I earn every dime I make.