Marty Feldman Quotes and Sayings - Page 1

“I won't eat anything that has intelligent life, but I'd gladly eat a network executive or a politician.”
-- Marty Feldman

#Funny #Intelligent #Vegetarianism
“You offer a sincere compliment on a great mustache and suddenly she's not your friend.”
-- Marty Feldman

#Mustache #Compliment #Sincere
“I don't know any jokes, which is embarrassing. I wish I did.”
-- Marty Feldman

#Wish #Embarrassing #Jokes
“I don't enjoy anything while I'm doing it. I enjoy having done things, though.”
-- Marty Feldman

#Done #Enjoy
“Sex is two plus two making five, rather than four. Sex is the X ingredient that you can't define, and it's that X ingredient between two people that make both a man and a woman good in bed. It's all relative. There are no rules.”
-- Marty Feldman

#Sex #Men #Two
“Comedy, like sodomy, is an unnatural act.”
-- Marty Feldman

#Comedy
“Too old to die young, and too young to grow up.”
-- Marty Feldman

#Growing Up #Young #Die Young
“Hookers have to deliver on their promise... unlike politicians.”
-- Marty Feldman

#Promise #Politician
“It could be worse... It could be raining”
-- Marty Feldman

#Rain
“Money can't buy poverty.”
-- Marty Feldman

#Money #Poverty
“He made us laugh, he took my pain away. I love you, Lauretta.”
-- Marty Feldman

#Pain #Tombstone #Love You
“I don't want to be a director. I want to direct. There's a difference.”
-- Marty Feldman

#Differences #Want #Directors

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