Funny Valentines Day quotes
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I wish Adam had died with all his ribs in his body.
-- Dion Boucicault -
You'd be surprised how much it costs to look this cheap!
-- Dolly Parton -
Sex, unlike justice, should not be seen to be done.
-- Evelyn Laye -
Love and a cough cannot be hid.
-- George Herbert -
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The jewelry stores say, 'Tell your wife you love her with a diamond,' while wives tell you they love you with, 'Ok, but just because it's Valentine's Day.'
-- George Lopez -
A man loses his sense of direction after four drinks; a woman loses hers after four kisses.
-- H. L. Mencken -
Today is February 14th - St. Valentine's day. Women call it Love day, while men name it as Extortion day.
-- Jay Leno -
Like the measles, love is most dangerous when it comes late in life.
-- Lord Byron -
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Basement smells bad. Look for cat poops, change litter.
-- Martha Stewart -
Love is just a chocolate substitute.
-- Melanie Clark Pullen -
I love Valentine's Day. When you're a kid everyone gets a Valentine. It's like 'TO TIM, NICE PANTS, LOVE SCOTT'. It's Valentines galore!
-- Mike Birbiglia -
A kiss makes the heart young again and wipes out the years.
-- Rupert Brooke -
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Ever have that one friend who gets a Valentine's Day gift for their mother? Doens't that freak you out a little? It's like, 'I don't know how to break this to you but I think she's banging your dad!'
-- Russ Meneve -
A man is only as good as what he loves.
-- Saul Bellow -
Today, folks, should be all about love. Unless you're old.
-- Stephen Colbert -
Romance is dead - it was acquired in a hostile takeover by Hallmark and Disney, homogenized, and sold off piece by piece.
-- Yeardley Smith -
