Alexander Woollcott famous quotes

05-17-2025

There is no such thing in anyone's life as an unimportant day.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Inspirational Life #Unimportant
The two oldest professions in the world â€” ruined by amateurs.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Two #World #Ruined
All the things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal or fattening.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Funny #Food #Finding Happiness
A hick town is one where there is no place to go where you shouldn't go.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Hicks #Towns
To all things clergic I am allergic.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Religion #Allergic
Many of us spend half of our time wishing for things we could have if we didn't spend half our time wishing.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Funny #Time #Insperational
It comes from the likes of you! Take what you can get! Grab the chances as they come along! Act in hallways! Sing in doorways! Dance in cellars!
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Doorways #Likes #Chance
The English have an extraordinary ability for flying into a great calm.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Flying #Calm #Ability
One listens to one's lawyer prattle on as long as one can stand it and then signs where indicated.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Law #Long #Lawyer
I'm tired of hearing it said that democracy doesn't work. Of course it doesn't work. We are supposed to work it.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Tired #Government #Democracy
It was Mrs. Campbell, for instance, who, on a celebrated occasion, threw her companion into a flurry by describing her recent marriage as "the deep, deep peace of the double-bed after the hurly-burly of the chaise-longue."
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Marriage #Bed #Companion
Once in pre-war days, when curiously-bonneted women drivers were familiar sights at the taxi-wheels, I cried out to one in my dismay: "Is there no speed limit in this mad city?""Oh, yes, monsieur," she answered sweetly over her shoulder, "but no one has ever succeeded in reaching it.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#War #Sight #Cities
Babies in silk hats playing with dynamite.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Baby #Government #Hats
Reading Proust is like bathing in someone else's dirty water.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Art #Reading #Dirty
There's nothing wrong with Oscar Levant - nothing a miracle won't cure.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Art #Miracle #Entertainment
The scenery in the play was beautiful, but the actors got in front of it.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Beautiful #Art #Play
His huff arrived and he departed in it.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Departed #Luck
There's absolutely nothing wrong with Oscar Levant that a miracle can't fix.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Personality #Miracle #Oscars
Everything I like is either illegal, immoral or fattening.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Illegal #Fattening #Immoral
Nothing risque, nothing gained.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Sex #Risque
You haven't lived until you died in New York.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#New York
She was like a sinking ship firing on the rescuers.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Sarcastic #Ships #Sinking
Today just might be the best day to start seriously thinking about quitting smoking...
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Encouragement #Thinking #Smoking
I count it a high honor to belong to a profession in which the good men write every paragraph, every sentence, every line, as lovingly as any Addison or Steele, and do so in full regard that by tomorrow it will have been burned, or used, if at all, to line a shelf.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Writing #Men #Good Man
Germany was the cause of Hitler as much as Chicago is responsible for the Chicago Tribune.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Cities #Causes #Chicago
At 83, George Bernard Shaw's mind was perhaps not quite as good as it used to be, but it was still better than anyone else's.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Mind #Bernard Shaw #Used
Los Angeles is seven suburbs in search of a city.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Cities #Los Angeles #Seven
Mrs. Patrick Cambell is an aged British battleship sinking rapidly and firing every available gun on her rescuers.
-- Alexander Woollcott

#Art #Gun #Entertainment

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