Funniest Friends Quotes:

You can always tell a real friend: when you've made a fool of yourself he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job.

- Laurence J. Peter

topic: Friendship, Best Friend, Jobs, Making Friends, Bff

Love is blind; friendship tries not to notice.

- Otto von Bismarck

topic: Funny Friend, Love Is, Trying, Bff, Cute Friendship

Friends and good manners will carry you where money won't go.

- Margaret Walker

source: Margaret Walker (2016). “Jubilee (50th Anniversary Edition)”, p.496, Houghton Mifflin Harcourt

topic: Love, Friendship, Family, Bad Manners, Money Isn't Everything

A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked.

- Bernard Meltzer

topic: Friendship, Thank You, True Friend, Impossible To Forget, Making Friends

Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.

- Mark Twain

topic: Life, Friendship, Book, Making Friends, Bff

When a woman becomes her own best friend life is easier.

- Diane von Furstenberg

topic: Life, Friendship, Funny Best Friend, Wise Women, Funniest Friends

The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole lifetime, if not asked to lend money.

- Mark Twain

source: Pudd'nhead Wilson ch. 8, "Pudd'nhead Wilson's Calendar" (1894)

topic: Friendship, Sweet, Money, Sweet Friendship, Funny Friendship

Friends: people who borrow my books and set wet glasses on them.

- Edwin Arlington Robinson

topic: Friendship, Book, Glasses, Funny Best Friend, Funniest Friends

Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.

- Oprah Winfrey

topic: Inspirational, Life, Friendship, Makin Money, Bff

Men kick friendship around like a football, but it doesn't seem to crack. Women treat it like glass and it goes to pieces.

- Anne Morrow Lindbergh

topic: Funny, Friendship, Football, Watching Football, Bad Friend

Tis the privilege of friendship to talk nonsense, and to have nonsense respected.

- Charles Lamb

source: "The Works of Charles Lamb".

topic: Friendship, Inspiring, Funny Best Friend, Bff, Cute Friendship

There are three faithful friends - an old wife, an old dog, and ready money.

- Benjamin Franklin

topic: Friendship, Dog, Money, Making Friends, Cute Friendship

It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them.

- Ralph Waldo Emerson

topic: Friendship, Best Friend, Positive, Bff, Songs And Friendship

It's the friends you can call up at 4 a.m. that matter.

- Marlene Dietrich

topic: Friendship, Best Friend, Cute Relationship, Making Friends, Bff

Friendship is like money, easier made than kept.

- Samuel Butler

source: Samuel Butler (1951). “Samuel Butler's notebooks”

topic: Friendship, Money, Funny Friend, Making Friends, Bff

What I know for sure is that if you can survive 11 days in cramped quarters with a friend and come out laughing, your friendship is the real deal. I know ours is.

- Oprah Winfrey

topic: Friendship, Real, Laughing, Funniest Friends, Clear Conscience

One measure of friendship consists not in the number of things friends can discuss, but in the number of things they need no longer mention.

- Clifton Fadiman

topic: Real, Real Friends, Numbers, Songs And Friendship, Inspiring Friends

Between friends differences in taste or opinion are irritating in direct proportion to their triviality.

- W. H. Auden

topic: Differences, Taste, Irritated, Funny Best Friend, Triviality

When a woman like that whom I've seen so much, All of a sudden drops out of touch; Is always busy and never can, Spare you a moment, it means a man.

- Alice Duer Miller

source: Alice Duer Miller, “Forsaking All Others Part 4”

topic: Mean, Funny Friend, Men, Funniest Friends

I've always said that in politics, your enemies can't hurt you, but your friends will kill you.

- Ann Richards

topic: Hurt, Funny Friend, Enemy, Funniest Friends

The capacity for friendship is God's way of apologizing for our families.

- Jay McInerney

source: Jay McInerney (2011). “The Last of the Savages”, p.3, Vintage

topic: Friendship, Family, Inspiring, Funniest Friends

There are some things you can't share without ending up liking each other.

- J. K. Rowling

topic: Funny Friendship, Liking Someone, Potters, Harry Potter, Being Awesome

Friendship will not stand the strain of very much good advice for very long.

- Robert Staughton Lynd

topic: Friendship, Long, Advice, Funny Friendship, Funniest Friends

It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn't use long, difficult words but rather short, easy words like "What about lunch?

- A. A. Milne

topic: Friendship, Teacher, Fun, Inspiring Friends, Long Friendship

Happiness is like peeing in your pants. Everyone can see it, but only you can feel the warmth.

- Jon Foreman

topic: Pants, Feels, Warmth, Cute Friendship, Funny Best Friend

I have a lot of funny friends, though not everyone's funny all the time. Doon Mackichan's my funniest friend in the pub; Nina Conti's the funniest with a monkey.

- Sally Phillips

topic: Funny Friend, Monkeys, Pubs, Funniest Friends