Ex Wife Quotes:

I'm on a search for my future ex-wife.

- Richie Sambora

source: "Richie Sambora Ready to Meet His 'Future Ex-Wife'". Interview with Mary S. Park, people.com. February 20, 2011.

topic: Wife, Ex Wife, My Future

All my life there's always been an ex-wife or a girlfriend.

- Ronnie Wood

topic: Girlfriend, Wife, Ex Wife

Whenever you want to marry someone, go have lunch with his ex-wife.

- Shelley Winters

topic: Lunch, Wife, Funny Marriage, Ex Wife, His Ex

A wife lasts only for the length of the marriage, but an ex-wife is there for the rest of your life.

- Woody Allen

topic: Breakup, Drinking, Divorce, Ex Wife

I had one of the best days of my life. I spent the afternoon with my two kids and my ex-wife at Serendipity. Then I came to the theater, and you know, I think I did the play the best Ive ever done it.

- Gabriel Byrne

topic: Kids, Thinking, Play, Ex Wife

It helps to be able to be alone. 'Cuz writing is done alone, unless you collaborate, but I don't do that. Ask my ex-wife.

- Dirk Benedict

topic: Writing, Wife, Done, Ex Wife

I play, in real life, Kim, who is actually Marshall Mathers ex-wife as of now. She lies and says she is pregnant because she really wants to keep him and he figures her out.

- Taryn Manning

topic: Real, Lying, Pregnancy, Ex Wife

Someone called all the newspapers in New York and told them I'd died. I've been told by almost everyone it was an ex-wife - I've had a few so it's hard to pinpoint which one - but who knows for sure?

- Richard Pryor

topic: New York, Wife, Newspapers, Ex Wife

I still love my former wife, I won't call her my ex-wife.

- Dave Pelzer

source: "'Help Yourself' author Dave Pelzer". Live chat, www.cnn.com. September 6, 2001.

topic: Wife, Former, Stills, Ex Wife

The drink? Yes, I've had tough times in my life, especially the last year, regarding my ex-wife, my kids, I nearly broke my neck, I was on death row with pneumonia.

- Paul Gascoigne

topic: Kids, Years, Pneumonia, Ex Wife, Death Row

I said, "It seems like you have fond feelings toward your ex-wife. Are you two still close?" "Nah," he said casually. "She thinks I changed my name to Motherfucker."

- Elizabeth Gilbert

source: "Eat, Pray, Love: One Woman's Search for Everything Across Italy, India and Indonesia". Book by Elizabeth Gilbert, February 16, 2006.

topic: Thinking, Names, Two, Ex Wife, Your Ex

Ah, yes, divorce... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet.

- Robin Williams

topic: Single, Money, Rip, Marriage And Divorce, Marriage Divorce

If a tree falls in the forest and kills your ex-wife, what do you do with the lumber?

- Neil S. Plakcy

topic: Fall, Divorce, Wife, Lumber, Ex Wife

My second ex-wife was really kind of like a ship passing in the night. Only she turned out to be the Exxon Valdez.

- James Woods

topic: Night, Wife, Love And Marriage, Ex Wife

You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work.

- Lee Trevino

topic: Sports, Husband, Games, Humorous Golf, Funny Sports

My ex-wife is a water sign and I'm an earth sign. Together we made mud.

- Rodney Dangerfield

topic: Funny, Water, Wife, Ex Wife

There is no fury like an ex-wife searching for a new lover.

- Cyril Connolly

topic: Women, Wife, Lovers, Ex Wife

I just don't like when there's a rumor that says I'm dating someone who is below my standards. But when I got divorced, my ex-wife said I was spending all my time with Lindsay Lohan and Angelina Jolie. I was like, 'Thank you for the big ups!'

- Marilyn Manson

topic: Dating Someone, Wife, Rumor, Ex Wife

You will not easily get a man to believe that his carnal love for the woman he has made his wife is as high a love as that he feltfor his mother or sister.

- D. H. Lawrence

source: D.H. Lawrence (2013). “Delphi Works of D.H. Lawrence (Illustrated)”, p.5231, Delphi Classics

topic: Sister, Mother, Sex, Ex Wife

My ex-wife, she really didn't like the material that I did. And that's something I regret, that I wasn't more careful about making sure that she was O.K. with it. I just sort of didn't ask. So that's how that goes.

- Louis C. K.

topic: Regret, Wife, Careful, Ex Wife

Besides Bob Satterfield, the only ones who ever hurt me were my ex-wives.

- Jake LaMotta

source: Los Angeles Times Interview, May 04, 1997.

topic: Hurt, Wife, Bob, Ex Wife

The reality is that I surround myself with very smart, very strong people - including my ex-wives.

- Ronald Perelman

topic: Strong, Smart, Reality, Ex Wife

I guess my main influences are Jesus, rock n roll and ex-wives. In that order.

- Sam Kinison

topic: Jesus, Order, Rocks, Ex Wife

To his ex-wife in court, he said I lost interest in you when the Botox lost its effect and you looked like a plastic doll that escaped from a fire.

- Peter Jackson

topic: Fire, Wife, Dolls, Ex Wife, His Ex

My ex-wife was trying to be nice once, so she took me to a concert in Los Angeles. I went with her to Symphony Hall, and the orchestra was playing. When the show started, the spotlight was sharp on this one man (Andres Segovia) and he had sombrero on and his guitar propped up like this and, oh man ... he was a master ! - I really heard it. That one guitar sounded like a whole orchestra to me.

- B. B. King

topic: Nice, Men, Guitar, Sombreros, Ex Wife

There was a man named Robert Dear who in court said he was a warrior for the babies, whose ex-wife talked about his Christian beliefs motivating his desire to attack and murder three people, including a police officer, in Colorado.That man is a Christian. He`s an avowed Christian. He appears to have acted on those Christian beliefs to undertake that act of violence.

- Chris Hayes

source: Source: www.msnbc.com

topic: Christian, Baby, Warrior, Acts Of Violence, Ex Wife

I don't care what is written," Meyer Landsman says. "I don't care what supposedly got promised to some sandal-wearing idiot whose claim to fame is that he was ready to cut his own son's throat for the sake of a hare-brained idea. I don't care about red heifers and patriarchs and locusts. A bunch of old bones in the sand. My homeland is in my hat. It's in my ex-wife's tote bag.

- Michael Chabon

topic: Son, Cutting, Ideas, Ex Wife, Totes

In my divorce, I stood up and said to my ex-wife, 'Hey, I messed up. This had nothing to do with you. I didn't understand what marriage was. I cheated. I was wrong. We couldn't fix it; it got worse. I stepped away because I didn't want it to get any worse. You're the mother of my kids - I don't want to hate you.'

- Kevin Hart

topic: Mother, Hate, Kids, Stood Up, Ex Wife

When you gotta go out and make a movie to pay for the kid's private school and for the three ex-wives, don't talk to me about your artistry. It's their job. It's not my job. It's my calling.

- Quentin Tarantino

source: "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

topic: Jobs, Kids, School, Don't Talk To Me, Ex Wife

And it soon became obvious to me that I had to process and keep my relationship with my ex-wife separate from that of my children. They didn't need or want too much personal information about our relationship. Change is good, and ultimately, creating a new path at this point in my life is energizing, creative, and rejuvenating.

- Tim Matheson

source: "Tim Matheson: On the Whole Live Challenge and never wallowing in disappointment". Interview with Robert Piper, www.marandapleasantmedia.com.

topic: Children, Creating, Wife, Energizing, Change Is Good

My mom [comes] to see my shows because she's so proud, but I'm talking about losing my virginity, my ex-wife and our sexual problems, and she's sitting in the front row smiling. I just go, "Mom, you can't sit in the front row, you can't smile. You have to go way in the back and dress in black. If I see you it's like you're breaking in when I'm having sex with my wife. It's just wrong."

- John Leguizamo

source: Interview with Haley Weiss, www.interviewmagazine.com. May 31, 2016.

topic: Mom, Sex, Talking, Ex Wife

It's not because I'm bitter or because I don't agree with him politically. I've always been a registered Republican. But it's bad taste to talk about ex-husbands and ex-wives, that's all. Also, I don't know a damn thing about politics.

- Jane Wyman

source: "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

topic: Husband, Wife, Taste, Ex Wife, Ex Husband

You may have even an ex-wife or an ex-husband, but you can never have ex-children.

- George Foreman

topic: Children, Husband, Wife, Ex Wife, Ex Husband

I can't go too much into my domestic life because there are ex-wives ready to do me in.

- Frank McCourt

topic: Wife, Too Much, Ready, Domestic Life, Ex Wife

Losing is like my ex-wife... it's a b****, and it takes a bigger man than me to live with it.

- Don Frye

topic: Men, Wife, Losing, Ex Wife

There is something about my aura or essence, or whatever, that draws the ex-wife characters to me. I don't seek them out, but people tend to think of me for that particular archetype, or whatever you want to call it, and I don't mind it. I think there is a strength to it.

- Natalie Zea

source: Source: collider.com

topic: Character, Thinking, Essence, Archetype, Ex Wife

My ex-wife was a philosophy major at NYU. Yeah, she and I used to have deep philosophical discussions where she would prove that I didn't exist.

- Woody Allen

topic: Philosophy, Philosophical, Nyu, Deep Philosophical, Ex Wife

I got a divorce because my ex-wife left me for another woman.

- Woody Allen

source: Manhattan, www.imdb.com. 1979.

topic: Divorce, Wife, Left, Ex Wife

Apparently, there's something hinky about the new iPhones. They're not hooked up right. ... There's a problem with the antenna. They don't like to be held - like my ex-wife.

- David Letterman

source: "Apple's iPhone briefing is underway" by Doug Gross, www.cnn.com. July 16, 2010.

topic: Iphone, Wife, Problem, Ex Wife, Antenna

And me having kids, with my family history? My mom: mentally ill, shot and killed her last husband. My father: six ex-wives, four heart attacks. Both of my parents think alcohol is a food group.

- Christopher Titus

source: "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

topic: Mom, Husband, Father, Having Kids, Mentally Ill

Someone once told me that there is more to life than golf. I think it was my ex-wife.

- Bruce Lansky

source: Bruce Lansky (2011). “Golf, It's Just a Game: The Best Quotes & Cartoons About Golf”, p.106, Simon and Schuster

topic: Golf, Thinking, Wife, Ex Wife, Greatest Golf

My parents, my teachers, my friends, my ex-wife-everybody held up a mirror and I accepted the image that came back. Well, it finally dawned on me that my reflection in others' eyes was the truth once removed.

- Richard Moran

source: Richard Moran (1990). “Dallas Down”, Jove Publications

topic: Teacher, Self Esteem, Eye, Ex Wife

You ask me about my ex-wife? That is not polite. But I will answer. I got another wife now. Much younger, much nicer, much prettier. And so much more intelligent than Benetton.'

- Oliviero Toscani

source: Source: valuet.wordpress.com

topic: Intelligent, Wife, Answers, Ex Wife

I saw Farrah Fawcett originally when she and her boyfriend, Lee Majors, came over to my house for a birthday party that I was having for my ex-wife, Leigh Taylor-Young.

- Ryan O'Neal

topic: Party, Wife, House, Ex Wife

She (my ex-wife) wanted me to stop being Evel Knievel. I am who I am. I'm not going to change. I'll settle down the day they put me in a six-foot pine box.

- Evel Knievel

topic: Retirement, Who I Am, Feet, Ex Wife

The number of American presidential candidates varies with the sunspot cycle and the phases of the moon. Being a Republican, I'm backing Hillary Clinton. Because she could lose. The reason is not that she's a woman. The reason is that she's the particular woman who taught the 4th grade class that every man in America wished he were dead in. Hillary Clinton is Lucy holding the football for Charlie Brown. Hillary Clinton is "America's ex-wife."

- P. J. O'Rourke

topic: Football, Moon, Men, Vary, Sunspots

I want my ex-wife and children to be happy.

- Scott Weiland

topic: Children, Wife, Want, Ex Wife

I talked to ex-wives of musicians of the '70s for research. They're the funniest people in the world, yet there is this sad, beautiful thing in their eyes that says they've seen more than they could ever possibly tell you

- Kate Hudson

topic: Beautiful, Eye, Wife, Ex Wife

My ex-wife has never broken 150. I wish she would stop telling people I taught her how to play golf.

- Bruce Lansky

topic: Golf, Play, People, Ex Wife

She sounds like a screeching ex-wife.

- Rush Limbaugh

topic: Stupid, Wife, Sound, Ex Wife