Car Keys Quotes:

I've lost my equilibrium, my car keys, and my pride.

- Tom Waits

source: Song: The One that Got Away, Album: Small Change

topic: Pride, Keys, Car, Car Keys

What I'd really like, Dad, is to borrow the car keys.

- Harry Chapin

topic: Family, Dad, Keys, Car Keys

When children reach the age of sixteen, they discover the meaning of life: car keys.

- Erma Bombeck

topic: Children, Keys, Car, Car Keys

How much smaller the large places are once we're grown up, when we have car keys and credit cards.

- Mary Karr

topic: Keys, Car, Credit, Car Keys

I remember things that happened sixty years ago, but if you ask me where I left my car keys five minutes ago, that's sometimes a problem.

- Lou Thesz

topic: Keys, Years, Car, Car Keys

Never lend your car keys to someone you gave birth to.

- Danielle Steel

source: Source: www.popsugar.com

topic: Keys, Car, Birth, Car Keys

Have you ever noticed that salvation, much like your car keys, is usually found where and when you least expect it? (Acheron)

- Sherrilyn Kenyon

source: Sherrilyn Kenyon, Alethea Kontis (2007). “The Dark-Hunter Companion”, p.311, Macmillan

topic: Keys, Car, Salvation, Car Keys

I can't find my car keys in the morning. Trying to get out of my house is a nightmare. "Where's my wallet? Where are my keys? I have to go find a missing person."

- Anthony LaPaglia

source: "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

topic: Morning, Keys, Fog, Car Keys, Missing A Person

One day, when I came home from work, I accidentally put my car key in the door of my apartment building. I turned it, and the whole building started up. So I drove it around. A policeman stopped me for going too fast. He said, "Where do you live?" I said, "Right here!" Then I drove my building onto the middle of a highway, and I ran outside, and told all of the cars to get the hell out of my driveway.

- Steven Wright

topic: Funny, Home, Humor, Driveway, Car Keys

Some people think my father was a spy, because of working for that government agency in Vietnam, but he can't find his car keys, much less keep a national secret.

- Lauren Graham

topic: Father, Thinking, Keys, Car Keys, Government Agencies

Gotta go let me get the car key You don't want it wit the Harajuku Barbie

- Nicki Minaj

topic: Bad Ass, Keys, Car, Car Keys

The year most of my high school friends and I got our driver's permits, the coolest thing one could do was stand outside after school and twirl one's car keys like a lifeguard whistle. That jingling sound meant freedom and power.

- Sloane Crosley

topic: School, Keys, Years, Lifeguard, Car Keys

To a dog, motoring isn't just a way of getting from here to there, it's also a thrill and an adventure. The mere jingle of car keys is enough to send most any dog into a whimpering, tail-wagging frenzy.

- Jon Winokur

topic: Funny, Dog, Adventure, Jingles, Car Keys

I firmly believe kids don't want your understanding. They want your trust, your compassion, your blinding love and your car keys, but you try to understand them and you're in big trouble.

- Erma Bombeck

source: Erma Bombeck (2013). “If Life Is a Bowl of Cherries, What Am I Doing in the Pits?”, p.110, Open Road Media

topic: Believe, Kids, Compassion, Car Keys

Sometimes people want to know how to write a story from the point of view of a murderer and make her sympathetic. I think the answer is that you start by having her look for her car keys, because everybody knows what it's like.

- Alice Mattison

topic: Writing, Thinking, Keys, Car Keys

US officials have now approved the first anti-obesity drug for dogs. I'm no a veterinarian, but if your dog is over eating, try putting a little less food in the bowl. Do we really need to give him a pill? Is the dog taking your car keys and driving to McDonalds?

- Jay Leno

topic: Dog, Keys, Mcdonalds, Veterinarian, Car Keys

Science is wonderful at explaining what science is wonderful at explaining, but beyond that it tends to look for its car keys where the light is good.

- Jonah Goldberg

topic: Keys, Light, Car, Car Keys

I once went to one of those parties where everyone throws their car keys into the middle of the room. I don't know who got my moped, but I drove that Peugeot for years.

- Victoria Wood

source: "Biography/Personal Quotes".

topic: Party, Years, Keys, Car Keys, Mopeds

There’s no black male my age, who’s a professional, who hasn’t come out of a restaurant and is waiting for their car and somebody didn’t hand them their car keys.

- Barack Obama

source: "The Obamas: How We Deal with Our Own Racist Experiences". Interview with Sandra Sobieraj Westfall, people.com. December 17, 2014.

topic: Keys, Hands, Car, Car Keys, Black Males

A common mistake we make is that we look for God in places where we ourselves wish to find him, yet even in the physical reality this is a complete failure. For example, if you lost your car keys, you would not search where you want to search, you would search where you must in order to find them.

- Criss Jami

source: Criss Jami (2015). “Killosophy”, p.60, Criss Jami

topic: Mistake, Reality, Keys, Car Keys

I found it." "People find pennies," Gansey replied. "Or car keys. Or four-leaf clovers." "And ravens," Ronan said. "You're just jealous 'cause" - at this point, he had to stop to regroup his beer-sluggish thoughts - "you didn't find one, too.

- Maggie Stiefvater

topic: Jealous, Beer, Keys, Gansey, Car Keys

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.

- P. J. O'Rourke

topic: Inspirational, Funny, Money, Power Corruption, Money And Power

One of the things that adds tension to our lives is small frustrations. Losing car keys can give you a panic attack. Not being able to find a comb when you get out of the shower, losing scissors and nail clippers, can make you fight with your roommate. The problem is that we think that these things are not supposed to happen to us. And that's what makes us tense. We think we can avoid these frustrations by making ourselves and others be more careful. I like to take the opposite tack-to assume that these things are a part of life and that they will happen no matter what.

- Jennifer James

source: Jennifer James (1986). “Success Is the Quality of Your Journey”, William Morrow Paperbacks

topic: Fighting, Frustration, Thinking, Scissors, Car Keys

I like it when very little children think for themselves, because they do not have access to car keys or credit cards or crack pipes, but they have some really funny lines.

- Roseanne Barr

source: Roseanne Barr (2012). “Roseannearchy: Dispatches from the Nut Farm”, p.174, Simon and Schuster

topic: Children, Thinking, Keys, Car Keys

Keys," she repeated, and slowly stepped back. "What do you mean, keys?" "Car keys. As in, give them up. Now." Shane had that look -- hard, and no bullshit. "We don't have time for your drama, Monica. Nobody does.

- Rachel Caine

topic: Drama, Mean, Keys, Monica, Car Keys

Dan was heading for the blue car in the driveway. He tossed Amy the car keys. "Don't drive like you! Make it fast!

- Peter Lerangis

source: Peter Lerangis (2012). “The 39 Clues: Cahills vs. Vespers Book 3: The Dead of Night”, p.94, Scholastic Inc.

topic: Blue, Keys, Car, Driveway, Car Keys

I'm not talking about losing [agricultural] diversity in the same way that you lose your car keys. I'm talking about losing it in the same way that we lost the dinosaurs: actually losing it, never to be seen again.

- Cary Fowler

topic: Keys, Talking, Car, Car Keys

What robs you from peace? Usually it's the so-called little things in life, like being late to work, or needing a parking place, or trying to find your glasses, your car keys when you are running out the door, those so called little stressors.

- Doreen Virtue

topic: Running, Keys, Glasses, Stressors, Car Keys

Usually the beginning of a story that people hear a lot. For example, "My girlfriend is upset about her new haircut" or "My dad keeps losing his car keys." And then I just think of different ways the story could end. "My girlfriend is upset about her new haircut. I don't understand why she's crying. I'm the one who has to get a new girlfriend." Then I try it out on stage. I don't do a lot of re-writing. My jokes either work or they don't. The trick is just to write a ton of jokes.

- Anthony Jeselnik

source: "Comedian Anthony Jeselnik: “He’s The Best!” -Everybody". Interview With David Dean, www.serialoptimist.com. November 29, 2010.

topic: Girlfriend, Dad, Writing, Car Keys, New Girlfriend

Why can't you summon a command line and search your real-world home for 'Honda car keys,' and specify rooms in your house to search instead of folders or paths in your computer's home directory? It's a crippling design flaw in the real-world interface.

- Richard Dooling

source: Richard Dooling (2008). “Rapture for the Geeks: When AI Outsmarts IQ”, p.6, Crown

topic: Real, Home, Keys, Interfaces, Car Keys

Even murderers, I suppose, experience the loss of car keys the way the rest of us do. I mean, how can they not? Once you make this person scramble around the house looking for her car keys and finally find them, get in the car, and run into traffic, we can identify with her enough that when she stops the car and pulls the gun out of her purse and heads in to kill somebody, we'll be with her as much as is possible.

- Alice Mattison

topic: Running, Mean, Loss, Car Keys

The other night I came home late, and tried to unlock my house with my car keys. I started the house up. So, I drove it around for a while. I was speeding, and a cop pulled me over. He asked where I lived. I said, "Right here, officer."

- Steven Wright

topic: Funny, Home, Humor, Car Keys, Speeding