Swear To God Quotes:

Bradley Cooper was an asshole, but he was - like Sidney Lumet, like George Clooney - the nicest guy in the world. I sound like the biggest ass-kisser ever. But I'm telling the truth, I swear to God!

- Peter Jacobson

topic: Swear To God, Guy, Sound

My mother says to me, when I'm making a new movie, she says, "Oh, is Steve Buscemi in it?" I'd say, "Yeah." And she, "Oh, then it's going to be a good one." I swear to God, she says that every time. And when I say Steve's not in it, she says, "Oh."

- Adam Sandler

topic: Mother, Swear To God, Yeah

Be quiet, or I swear to God I'll take you right here

- Susan Elizabeth Phillips

source: Susan Elizabeth Phillips (2013). “This Heart Of Mine: Number 5 in series”, p.169, Hachette UK

topic: Swear To God, Quiet, Swear

People have no morals, I swear to God. The things that people do for ratings! It's unforgivable.

- Madonna Ciccone

source: "Madonna's Moral Crusade". WENN, November 7, 2002.

topic: Swear To God, People, Moral

Ritie, don't worry 'cause you ain't pretty. Plenty pretty women I seen digging ditches or worse. You smart. I swear to God, I rather you have a good mind than a cute behind.

- Maya Angelou

source: Maya Angelou (2012). “The Collected Autobiographies of Maya Angelou”, p.55, Modern Library

topic: Cute, Smart, Swear To God, Caged, Digging Ditches

Your eyes have turned as black as a Crow’s,” she blurted out. He didn’t even blink over her bizarre comment. “Not this time, Christina,” he said in a furious whisper. “Compliments won’t get me off balance again, my little temptress. I swear to God, if you ever again dismiss me so casually, I’m going to––” “Oh, it wasn’t a compliment,” Christina interrupted, letting him see her irritation. “How presumptuous of you to think it was. The Crow is our enemy.

- Julie Garwood

topic: Eye, Thinking, Swear To God, Christina, Temptress

I swear to god; happiness is the best makeup.

- Drew Barrymore

topic: Beauty, Makeup, Swear To God, Happiness Is A Choice

Now filet mignon come with every meal. I swear to God that I'm so high, Feel like i am going up a hill.

- Wiz Khalifa

topic: Meaningful, Swear To God, Meals, Filet Mignon

There were times, especially when I was traveling for 'Eat, Pray, Love,' when, I swear to God, I would feel this weight of my female ancestors, all those Swedish farmwives from beyond the grave who were like, 'Go! Go to Naples! Eat more pizza! Go to India, ride an elephant! Do it! Swim in the Indian Ocean. Read those books. Learn a language.'

- Elizabeth Gilbert

topic: Ocean, Book, Swear To God, Naples

Sex is something I really don't understand too hot. You never know where the hell you are... Sex is something I just don't understand. I swear to God.

- J. D. Salinger

source: J. D. SALINGER (1951). “THE CATCHER IN THE RYE”

topic: Sex, Swear To God, Hot, Horsing Around

That's the terrible part. I swear to God I'm a madman.

- J. D. Salinger

source: J.D. Salinger (1951). “The Catcher in the Rye”

topic: Swear To God, Terrible, Madmen

Anyway, I'm sort of glad they've got the atomic bomb invented. If there's ever another war, I'm going to sit right the hell on top of it. I'll volunteer for it, I swear to God I will.

- J. D. Salinger

source: J. D. SALINGER (1951). “THE CATCHER IN THE RYE”

topic: War, Swear To God, Volunteer, Atomic Bomb, Atomic War

But I'm Crazy. I swear to God I am.

- J. D. Salinger

source: J. D. SALINGER (1951). “THE CATCHER IN THE RYE”

topic: Crazy, Swear To God, Swear

I swear to God, I went in to buy bikinis, and the lady's like, 'You're not getting out of this store 'til you get down there and show me what you do for those abs and the arms.' She wouldn't sell me my bikinis! I had to get on the floor and do the stomach thing.

- Sharon Stone

topic: Swear To God, Arms, Bikinis

Grief, I swear to God, doesn't live in the heart. It lives in the senses. And sometimes, all I want to do is cut off my nose so I can't smell her, hack my fingers off at the joint.

- Dennis Lehane

topic: Grief, Heart, Cutting, Swear To God

I swear to God, I would marry the first person who asked me, just because it seems so completely impossible that anyone would ask.

- Minnie Driver

topic: Firsts, Impossible, Marry Me, Swear To God

I'd swear to God, if I were a piano player or an actor or something and all those dopes thought I was terrific, I'd hate it. I wouldn't even want them to clap for me. People always clap for the wrong things. If I were a piano player, I'd play it in the goddam closet.

- J. D. Salinger

source: J. D. SALINGER (1951). “THE CATCHER IN THE RYE”

topic: Hate, Player, Dope, Terrific, Swear To God

When you swear to God, its true ... right now God is watching and saying, this is true.

- Dane Cook

topic: Swear, Swear To God

I don't want anything bad to happen to the United States, but if North Korea ever drops a nuclear bomb on this country, I swear to God I hope it lands in Hartford, Connecticut.

- Dave Chappelle

source: "Women Reporters Face Added Risks In Conflict Zones". "Tell Me More" with Michel Martin, www.npr.org. February 22, 2011.

topic: Country, Korea, Land, Connecticut, Nuclear Bomb

I swear to God, if I get shot again, Indigo will strangle me.

- Nalini Singh

topic: Shots, Indigo, Swear, Swear To God

I swear to God, if you saw me when I am by myself in the woods, I'm a lunatic. I sing, I dance.

- Chris Evans

topic: Dance, Woods, Saws, Swear To God

I told her I loved her and all. It was a lie, of course, but the thing is, I meant it when I said it. I'm crazy. I swear to God I am.

- J. D. Salinger

topic: Crazy, Lying, Said, Swear To God

There's a plan B? Jack asked. "You're another," Edilio snapped. "You're not going to tell me again that you won't fight, because I swear to God I'll shoot you myself.

- Michael Grant

topic: Fighting, Plan B, Plans, Swear To God

Let go of me or slow down," she demanded as she tried to keep pace with him. He slowed down. "I swear to God, you try the patience of a saint." "You aren't a saint, Brodick, no matter what your mother might have told you.

- Julie Garwood

topic: Letting Go, Mother, Trying, Swear To God

Trouble follows you like a shadow, Gillian. You're prone to injuries. I swear to God, if a tree decided to fall right now, it would find your head to land on." "Oh, for heaven's sake," she muttered. "I'll admit that I have had a run of bad fortune, but—" He wouldn't let her continue. "A run of bad fortune? Since I've known you, you've been beaten, stabbed and now shot with an arrow. If this keeps up, you'll be dead in another month

- Julie Garwood

topic: Running, Fall, Arrows, Bad Fortune, Swear To God

I swear to God, I don't remember anything Gwyneth Paltrow was in. Some people get hot by association. I heard more about her and Brad Pitt and I ever heard about her work.

- Jennifer Lopez

topic: People, Hot, Association, Swear To God

As long as he has a house with two bathrooms. I swear to God, I don't care if he's Jack the Ripper.

- Janet Evanovich

topic: Two, Long, House, Jack The Ripper, Swear To God

He shakes his head with a slow smile. You'd better be right. If the phone rings, I'm unpluggining it, I swear to God-“ You'd do that to your five-year-old sister?“ I gasp in mock outrage. For one whole night alone? Jesus, Maya, I'd sell her to the gypsies!

- Tabitha Suzuma

topic: Jesus, Night, Phones, Mock, Nights Alone

I can’t believe this night. I was supposed to be applauded and instead, I’m ruined. I swear to God in heaven if I ever see that man again, I will commit murder. (Tory) Well, if you need help moving the body, you know where Kim and I live. (Pam)

- Sherrilyn Kenyon

source: Sherrilyn Kenyon (2008). “Acheron: A Dark-Hunter Novel”, p.483, Macmillan

topic: Believe, Moving, Night, Swear To God

Rowdy, hopped-up college kids pass us in an endless, noisy blur like they're being mass produced or squeezed out of a tube - guys skulking in their T-shirts and cargo shorts, girls in low-slung jeans and flip-flops, pimples and breasts and tattoos and lipstick and legs and bra straps, and cigarettes; a colorful, sexy melange. I feel old and tired and I just want to be them again, want to be young and stupid, filled with angst and attitude and unbridled lust. Can I have a do-over, please? I swear to God I'll make a real go of it this time.

- Jonathan Tropper

topic: Tattoo, Girl, Sexy, Cargo, Flip Flops

I never got into Linux. I swear to God, it's only lack of time. I'm past the years of my life where I can really dig into something like running a Linux system. I'm very sympathetic to the whole idea; Linux people always think the way I want to think.

- Steve Wozniak

topic: Running, Past, Thinking, Lack Of Time, Swear To God

Men tend to lie when it comes to sexual conquests. You should hear some of the ego-driven lies my friends have told me: 'Swear to God, man - the hooker gave the money back.'

- Adam Ferrara

topic: Funny, Lying, Humor, Swear To God

When did I turn into a needywhiny angsty idiot who needed to be swept off her feet? She snorted then started running again, forcing me into a brief sprint to catch up. We're conditioned from birth she said. I swear to god,if I ever have a daughter I'll ban all of the Disney princesses from the house. Except Mulan. She kicks ass.

- Diana Rowland

topic: Running, Daughter, Princess, Sprint, Swear To God

Last night, I went to a birthday party, and this girl brought a cake and a cheesecake. And the other girls that lived in the apartment, I swear to God, all night long: 'You're taking that cake with you when you go. That cake's not staying in this house.' Like it's this evil, Hope Diamond, nuclear, horrifying cursed thing.

- Janeane Garofalo

topic: Girl, Party, Night, Other Girl, Cheesecake

In health we're doing the digestive system. We each got assigned a topic for an oral report. I got the small intestine. I swear to god I hate my life.

- Lynda Barry

topic: Hate, Topics, Intestines, Digestive System, Hate My Life

Record company execs eat their young, I swear to God.

- Linda Barnes

source: Linda Barnes (2015). “Steel Guitar”, p.56, Open Road Media

topic: Music, Records, Young, Swear To God

People are sometimes like: "Oh man, you're so talented and you do a bunch of stuff." I'm not! I swear to god, I'm not. I just like learning stuff, I like doing stuff. And I feel like everybody can definitely do it.

- Donald Glover

source: "Donald Glover a.k.a. Childish Gambino backstage at Big Day Out '13". Interview with Shahlin Graves, www.coupdemainmagazine.com. March 21, 2013.

topic: Men, People, Stuff, Stuff I Like, Swear To God

I swear to God, I will see [the Palestinian state], whether as a martyr or alive. Please, God, give me the honor of becoming a martyr in the fight for Jerusalem.

- Yasser Arafat

topic: Fighting, Giving, Honor, Swear To God

I want to play trailer trash; I swear to God.

- Joan Van Ark

source: "The Joan Van Ark Exclusive Interview". Interview with Knots Landing Fan, www.knotslanding.net. June 21, 2018.

topic: Play, Want, Trash, Swear To God

I think happiness is a choice. I believe luck is your attitude. It sounds like a really annoying bumper sticker. But there is such a great truth in that. You choose how you want to feel about what happens to you. I could have been a miserable failure. I haven't had anybody looking over me, and I've found my own way through optimistic exploration and fire-burning mistakes. I am a very happy person with an extraordinary life, so I must be doing a lot of things right. I really believe when you peel away the layers, the worlds is a beautiful place filled with beautiful people.

- Drew Barrymore

topic: Beautiful, Attitude, Mistake, Sticker, Beautiful People

Surfing's the source. Can change your life. Swear to god

- Patrick Swayze

topic: Surfing, Changing Your Life, Source, Surfer, Swear To God

So I swear to God, I took one year where I just said, This year, I'm just going to cop to it and say to people, 'Okay, where did we meet?' But it just got worse. People were more offended. Every now and then, someone will give me context, and I'll say, 'Thank you for helping me.' But I piss more people off. You get this thing, like, 'You're being egotistical. You're being conceited.' But it's a mystery to me, man. I can't grasp a face and yet I come from such a design/aesthetic point of view. I am going to get it tested.

- Brad Pitt

topic: Conceited, Men, Views, Thank You For Helping, Thank You For Helping Me