Youth Funny Quotes:

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

- Mark Twain

topic: Inspirational, Funny, Motivational, Humorous Birthday, Staying Young

How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?

- Satchel Paige

source: Quoted in Garson Kanin, It Takes a Long Time to Become Young (1978)

topic: Birthday, Baseball, Fun, Staying Young, Inspirational Age

You're only young once, but you can be immature forever.

- Germaine Greer

topic: Life, Happy Birthday, Happiness, Humorous Birthday, Mature And Immature

A man is not old until regrets take the place of dreams.

- John Barrymore

source: "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

topic: Love, Inspirational, Life, Man Of My Dreams, Staying Young

Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life.

- H. H. Asquith

source: In Observer 15 Apr. 1923

topic: Birthday, Would Be, Littles, Funny Retirement, Wise Birthday

The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.

- Lucille Ball

topic: Happy Birthday, Beauty, Funny Inspirational, Humorous Birthday, Staying Young

There is a fountain of youth: it is your mind, your talents, the creativity you bring to your life and the lives of people you love. When you learn to tap this source, you will truly have defeated age.

- Sophia Loren

source: "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

topic: Life, Birthday, Uplifting, Staying Young, Inspirational Age

Forty is the old age of youth; fifty the youth of old age.

- Victor Hugo

topic: Health, Medicine, 50th Birthday, Staying Young, Inspirational Age

When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.

- Mark Twain

topic: Birthday, Age, Remember, Humorous Birthday, Witty Birthday

A boy's story is the best that is ever told.

- Charles Dickens

topic: Time, Son, Boys, Good Boy, Little Boys

You are as young as your faith, as old as your doubt; as young as your self-confidence, as old as your fear, as young as your hope, as old as your despair.

- Samuel Ullman

source: "The Silver Treasury, Prose and Verse for Every Mood" by Jane Manner, (p. 323-24), 1934.

topic: Birthday, Confidence, Self, Staying Young, Inspirational Age

Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself.

- Tom Wilson

topic: Happy Birthday, Wisdom, Silly, Old Jokes, Coming Of Age

To get back my youth I would do anything in the world, except take exercise, get up early, or be respectable.

- Oscar Wilde

topic: Birthday, Exercise, Thought Provoking, Age And Youth, Youth Funny

The first forty years of life give us the text; the next thirty supply the commentary on it.

- Arthur Schopenhauer

topic: Birthday, Philosophical, Years, Milestone Birthday, 20th Birthday

Do not worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older it will avoid you.

- Joey Adams

source: Joey Adams (1981). “Strictly for laughs”, A & W Publishers, Inc.

topic: Funny, Life, Birthday, Old Age Humor, Old Birthday

You are as young as your faith, as old as your doubt, as young as your self-confidence, as old as your fear.

- Paul H. Dunn

topic: Self Confidence, Self, Doubt, Old Soldiers, Growing Old

You can only be young once. But you can always be immature.

- Dave Barry

topic: Cute, Birthday, Teenage, Mature And Immature, Rainstorms

This is a youth-oriented society, and the joke is on them because youth is a disease from which we all recover.

- Dorothy Fuldheim

source: "Why brands side-line the over-50s at their peril" by Crispin Reed, www.theguardian.com. November 28, 2013.

topic: Disease, Youth, Aging, Youth Funny

Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's Eve. Middle age is when you're forced to.

- Bill Vaughan

topic: Motivational, Christmas, New Year, Spiritual New Year, Year One

There is still no cure for the common birthday.

- John Glenn

source: "Ohio's Sen. Glenn Won't Run Again In 1998" by Candy Crowley, www.cnn.com.

topic: Birthday, Friends, Death, Humorous Birthday, Milestone Birthday

Age is something that doesn't matter, unless you are a cheese. Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

- Jack Benny

topic: Mind, Age, Matter, Humorous Birthday, Staying Young

Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle.

- Bob Hope

topic: Birthday, Witty, Funny Inspirational, Old Jokes, Celebrate Birthday

The years between fifty and seventy are the hardest. You are always being asked to do things, and yet you are not decrepit enough to turn them down.

- George Eliot

topic: Funny, Happy Birthday, Time, Milestone, Milestone Birthday

The denunciation of the young is a necessary part of the hygiene of older people, and greatly assists the circulation of the blood.

- Logan Pearsall Smith

source: Afterthoughts (1931) "Age and Death"

topic: Blood, Hygiene, People, Circulation, Older People

All diseases run into one, old age.

- Ralph Waldo Emerson

topic: Running, Funny Relationship, Hair, Old Jokes, 30th Birthday

Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once.

- Dave Barry

topic: People, Age, Routine, Diet Coke, Medical Advances

I never took the game home with me. I always left it in some bar.

- Bob Lemon

source: "Passage: Bob Lemon, 79". www.wired.com. January 13, 2000.

topic: Funny, Home, Games, Baseball Games, Youth Funny

Middle age occurs when you are too young to take up golf and too old to rush up to the net.

- Franklin P. Adams

topic: Birthday, Golf, Age, Middle Ages, Inspirational Birthday

To know how to grow old is the master work of wisdom, and one of the most difficult chapters in the great art of living.

- Herman Melville

topic: Life, Birthday, Time, Staying Young, Quotations Birthday Happy Birthday