Don Rickles Quotes and Sayings - Page 1

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“I think if I took therapy, the doctor would quit. He'd just pick up the couch and walk out of the room.”
-- Don Rickles

#Thinking #Doctors #Rooms
“Who picks your clothes - Stevie Wonder?”
-- Don Rickles

#Funny #Clothes #Wonder
“Smartphones. Who cares? Smartphones. I only have dummy phones.”
-- Don Rickles

#Phones #Who Cares #Dummy
“They always use the word 'insult' with me, but I don't hurt anybody. I wouldn't be sitting here if I did. I make fun of everybody and exaggerate all our insecurities.”
-- Don Rickles

#Hurt #Fun #Insecurity
“Struggling is hard because you never know what's at the end of the tunnel.”
-- Don Rickles

#Struggle #Tunnels #Light At The End Of The Tunnel
“I'd like to think my performance is today. I never try to - it's so, as you know, watching me, I have a beginning, middle and ending. But every night the show changes and I relate to an audience and I relate to the young people.”
-- Don Rickles

#Night #Thinking #People
“Italians are fantastic people, really. They can work you over in an alley while singing an opera.”
-- Don Rickles

#People #Singing #Opera
“When you stand alone and sell yourself, you can't please everyone. But when you're different, you can last.”
-- Don Rickles

#Different #Lasts #Stand Alone
“The transformation has been unbelievable. When I started here, I worked in a place where the Sky Room was on the second floor.”
-- Don Rickles

#Sky #Rooms #Transformation
“I was sitting in the toilet and I was by myself. I was tired of playing with the roller, so I said I'd better write a book.”
-- Don Rickles

#Book #Writing #Tired
“You throw your best punch, otherwise don't do it.”
-- Don Rickles
“Show business is my life. When I was a kid I sold insurance, but nobody laughed.”
-- Don Rickles

#Kids #Controversial #Provocative
“The old days were the old days. And they were great days. But now is now.”
-- Don Rickles

#Great Day
“I cannot tell a joke. But I can do a situation, that it becomes a joke.”
-- Don Rickles

#Situation #Jokes
“It takes many years to be a great comedian.”
-- Don Rickles

#Years #Comedian
“Well, I call myself an actor. I always wanted to be one.”
-- Don Rickles

#Actors #Wells #Wanted
“My whole act is off the top of my head.”
-- Don Rickles
“Sex is great, but when you get to be my age, you've got to pace it a little bit. Otherwise you get tired.”
-- Don Rickles

#Sex #Tired #Age
“I'm very shy so I became very outgoing to protect my shyness.”
-- Don Rickles

#Shy #Shyness #Outgoing
“When you enter a room, you have to kiss his ring. I don't mind, but he has it in his back pocket.”
-- Don Rickles

#Music #Kissing #Mind
“Eddie Fisher married to Elizabeth Taylor is like me trying to wash the Empire State Building with a bar of soap.”
-- Don Rickles

#Trying #Bars #Empires
“Some people say funny things, but I say things funny.”
-- Don Rickles

#Funny Things #People
“You can't study comedy; it's within you. It's a personality. My humor is an attitude.”
-- Don Rickles

#Attitude #Humor #Personality
“Everything I've ever done in my whole career, people might not know, I've never written anything down on paper.”
-- Don Rickles

#Careers #People #Done
“I do situations and make fun of authority and life.”
-- Don Rickles

#Fun #Authority #Situation
“To my knowledge, I was the first guy really to do what I do. And then later on different comedians started trying doing it.”
-- Don Rickles

#Guy #Comedian #Trying
“I was always the guy - out of insecurities, I was always making fun, even as a kid.”
-- Don Rickles

#Fun #Kids #Guy
“Political correctness? In my humor, I never talk about politics. I was never much into all that.”
-- Don Rickles

#Political #Political Correctness
“I have no idea what I'm going to say when I stand up to give a toast. But I do know that anything I say I find funny.”
-- Don Rickles

#Ideas #Giving #Toasts
“You know what's funny to me? Attitude.”
-- Don Rickles

#Attitude

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