Pie quotes

  • When I look at a pie chart, I just go numb.
    -- Aaron Koblin

    #Pie #Looks #Numb

  • It is all very well to say that children are happier with mud pies and rag dolls than with these elaborate delights. There may be something in this theory, but when their amusements are carried to such a point of luxurious and imaginative perfection it certainly gives them great and even unlimited enjoyment at the time.
    -- Ada Leverson

    #Children #Pie #Giving

  • I don't think I've ever seen pie advertised. That's how you know it's good. They advertise ice cream and other desserts. They advertise the bejeezus out of yogurt, but I haven't seen one pie commercial.
    -- Adam Carolla

    #Thinking #Ice Cream #Pie

  • What I find interesting is how close you can run the laughter along the seam of seriousness, and occasionally cross it, so that half the house genuinely doesn't know whether to laugh or cry. Custard pie humour is fairly universal, but at the other end, which I'm more interested in, there's the humour that hovers on the darkness, that walks in the shadow of something else, not always that obvious.
    -- Alan Ayckbourn

    #Running #Laughter #Pie

  • I think there should be laughs in everything. Sometimes, it's a slammed door, a pie in the face or just a recognition of our frailties.
    -- Alan Rickman

    #Thinking #Doors #Pie

  • No, ordinary behaviour. The efficient half eats the less efficient half and grows stronger. War is just a violent way of doing what half the people do calmly in peacetime: using the other half for food, heat, machinery and sexual pleasure. Man is the pie that bakes and eats himself, and the recipe is separation.
    -- Alasdair Gray

    #War #Men #Pie

  • You're a wizard," I snapped. "Can't you just use magic to make your own food?" "Ah, yes," he retorted. "Because mud pies are so very delicious and the wind fills empty stomachs quite nicely.
    -- Alexandra Bracken

    #Pie #Wind #Magic

  • A pie dough comes together exactly like a biscuit only there is very, very little liquid and no leavening involved. Other than that, the same rules apply. My best advice: handle the dough as little as possible.
    -- Alton Brown

    #Pie #Advice #Together

  • My final, considered judgment is that the hardy bulb [garlic] blesses and ennobles everything it touches - with the possible exception of ice cream and pie.
    -- Angelo Pellegrini

    #Ice Cream #Vegetables #Pie

  • Jihad is becoming as American as apple pie and as British as afternoon tea.
    -- Anwar al-Awlaki

    #Apples #Pie #Tea

  • ...oppression is as American as apple pie...
    -- Audre Lorde

    #Apples #Pie #Apple Pie

  • A green, Fifa Coins| Fifa Coins| Fifa Coins| Fifa Coins| Fifa Coins| replica watches|renewable energy economy isn't some pie-in-the-sky, far-off future - it is now. It is creating jobs - now. It is providing cheap alternatives to $140-per-barrel oil - now. And it can create millions of additional jobs, an entire new industry, if we act - now.
    -- Barack Obama

    #Jobs #Oil #Pie

  • You like pie? I like pie.
    -- Barack Obama


  • The profoundly cynical premise of all religionists is that people are not capable of behaving decently toward one another unless they are lured with promises of pie in the sky and simultaneously terrorized by the threats of extreme nastiness in the eternal afterlife in hell.
    -- Barbara G. Walker

    #Sky #Afterlife #Pie

  • When people are frightened about going hungry and paying their mortgages, a scarcity model begins to prevail; they fear someone else will get their piece of the pie.
    -- Barbara Kingsolver

    #Pie #People #Scarcity

  • Your perceptions are derived from your feelings and your ability to be yourself, to own and trust yourself, and to say what you feel, even when it may be diametrically opposed to everyone eles's opinion. You may be called the Devil Incarnate. You may feel like cow pies are being thrown at you. Sometimes that is part of being true to yourself.
    -- Barbara Marciniak

    #Being Yourself #Pie #Feelings

  • Don't go into Mr. McGregor's garden: your Father had an accident there; he was put in a pie by Mrs. McGregor.
    -- Beatrix Potter

    #Father #Garden #Pie

  • The key to changing our past, present, and future is to create our piece of the PIE (our Perceptions, Interpretations, & Expectations) on purpose.
    -- Bill Crawford

    #Past #Pie #Keys

  • You had me at fruit pies
    -- Bobby Hill

    #Pie #Fruit

  • My mom makes something called green pie, which I thought was a delicacy that many people only had at Thanksgiving, but it turns out it was just Jell-O with whipped cream on it. And it's delicious.
    -- Bobby Moynihan

    #Mom #Pie #People

  • Let's not talk about Communism. Communism was just and idea, just pie in the sky.
    -- Boris Yeltsin

    #Sky #Ideas #Pie

  • Say no to death pies. Another good motto.
    -- Brandon Mull

    #Pie #Motto

  • Waving the flag at the 1976 Olympics wasn't my idea. It was too much apple pie and ice cream. Not that I don't love my country, but I felt it was my victory up there, I put all the time into it.
    -- Bruce Jenner

    #Country #Apples #Pie

  • Life isn't all fricasseed frogs and eel pie.
    -- C. S. Lewis

    #Eels #Pie #Frogs

  • American feminism's nose dive began when Kate Millet, that imploding beanbag of poisonous self-pity, declared Freud a sexist. Trying to build a sex theory without studying Freud, women have made nothing but mud pies.
    -- Camille Paglia

    #Sex #Self #Pie

  • It is satisfying following such an emphatic victory over the current unbeaten champion (Lucian Bute) to know that there's a lot of people eating humble pie.
    -- Carl Froch

    #Motivation #Humble #Pie

  • If you want to make a [rhubarb] pie from scratch, first you have to create the universe.
    -- Carl Sagan

    #Pie #Scratches #Want

  • I am an indifferent cook, but I can make pie.
    -- Caroline Leavitt

    #Pie #Indifferent #Cooks

  • I remember I was so crabby in my third trimester - I got gestational diabetes because I'd been acting like I was in a one-woman pie-eating contest.
    -- Caroline Rhea

    #Pie #Acting #Remember

  • The group Bananarama has such a light, cutesy-pie sound that they make The Go-Go's sound like Led Zeppelin by comparison.
    -- Casey Kasem

    #Light #Pie #Sound

  • Alphabet Juice is the book Roy Blount was born to write, which considering his prodigious talent, is saying a lot. Did you know that the word LAUGH is linguistically related to chickens and pie? This is the book that any of us who urgently, passionately love words-to read them, roll them over the tongue and learn their life stories while laughing and eating chicken and pie-were lucky enough to be born to read.
    -- Cathleen Schine

    #Book #Writing #Pie

  • I'm what is known as perimenopausal. "Peri", some of you may know, is a Latin prefix meaning 'SHUT YOUR FLIPPIN' PIE HOLE'.
    -- Celia Rivenbark

    #Latin #Pie #May

  • I'm a big cook and prefer to make meals at home when I can. I'm either cooking, or we're going to a drive-through somewhere. I'm really proud of my homemade sweet potato pie. At Thanksgiving I make five of them because they go quick.
    -- Chandra Wilson

    #Sweet #Home #Pie

  • Mud-pies gratify one of our first and best instincts. So long as we are dirty, we are pure.
    -- Charles Dudley Warner

    #Dirty #Pie #Long

  • I will take a pie in the face any time for a worthy cause.
    -- Cheryl Richardson

    #Pie #Faces #Causes

  • As someone who's very nerd-minded, whenever I see a lot of cross-platform stuff when I get bonus material on either side, then it makes me want to dive deeper, sort of like tearing apart the different pieces of the pie.
    -- Chris Hardwick

    #Pie #Nerd #Different

  • One piece of pie is delicious. Fourteen pieces are obviously nauseating.
    -- Chuck Barris

    #Pie #Pieces #One Piece

  • Nobody can fail to lose weight in the jungle, unless they've got a secret stash of pork pies somewhere.
    -- Colin Baker

    #Pie #Secret #Pork

  • I've read hundreds of cookbooks. Most of those cookbooks don't even tell you how to get a steak ready, how to bake biscuits or an apple pie.
    -- Colonel Sanders

    #Apples #Pie #Biscuits

  • Nothing rekindles my spirits, gives comfort to my heart and mind, more than a visit to Mississippi... and to be regaled as I often have been, with a platter of fried chicken, field peas, collard greens, fresh corn on the cob, sliced tomatoes with French dressing... and to top it all off with a wedge of freshly baked pecan pie.
    -- Craig Claiborne

    #Food #Heart #Pie

  • There is nothing better on a cold wintry day than a properly made pot pie.
    -- Craig Claiborne

    #Pie #Cold #Pot

  • Where subtlety fails us we must simply make do with cream pies.
    -- David Brin

    #Pie #Failing #Cream

  • Let's stop for a moment to admire the rotating pies.
    -- David Letterman

    #Pie #Moments #Admire

  • We must have a pie. Stress cannot exist in the presence of a pie.
    -- David Mamet

    #Stress #Food #Pie

  • If someone throws a pie at your face, just open your mouth really wide and say, 'Thanks for feeding me, a**hole.'
    -- Demetri Martin

    #Pie #Mouths #Faces

  • Clowns have no respect for pie.
    -- Demetri Martin

    #Pie #No Respect #Clown

  • This is a pie chart about procrastination.
    -- Demetri Martin

    #Funny #Procrastination #Pie

  • Success is not a pie with a limited number of pieces. The success of others has very little bearing on your success. You and everyone you know can become successful without anyone suffering setbacks, harm, or downturns.
    -- Denis Waitley

    #Successful #Pie #Numbers

  • When people ask me what 'American Pie' means, I tell them it means I don't ever have to work again if I don't want to.
    -- Don McLean

    #Mean #Pie #People

  • American Pie speaks to the loss that we feel. That's why that song has found the niche that it has.
    -- Don McLean

    #Song #Loss #Pie

  • In a sense, 'American Pie' was a very despairing song but it can also be seen as very hopeful.
    -- Don McLean

    #Song #Pie #Hopeful

  • I would give you my soul in a blackberry pie; and a knife to cut it with.
    -- Dorothy Dunnett

    #Cutting #Knives #Pie

  • I always wanted to host a show, throw whipped-cream pies. Theater is not my cup of tea.
    -- Doug Davidson

    #Pie #Tea #Cups

  • Another lesson about a naive fool who came to Babylon, and found out that the pie don't taste so sweet.
    -- Dwight Yoakam

    #Sweet #Pie #Lessons

  • There is something in the red of a raspberry pie that looks as good to a man as the red in a sheep looks to a wolf.
    -- E. W. Howe

    #Men #Sheep #Pie

  • There's no diet list I'll follow that would rule out cherry pie.
    -- Edgar Guest

    #Pie #Lists #Cherries

  • Except for the scale of the operation, there was nothing unusual about Hitler's massacre of the Jews. Genocide's an old tradition, as human as mother love or cherry pie.
    -- Edward Abbey

    #Mother #Pie #Tradition

  • The world is like a dropped pie most of the time. Don't kill yourself trying to put it back together. Just grab a fork and eat some of it off the floor. Then carry on.
    -- Elizabeth Gilbert

    #Pie #Trying #Together

  • You can't imagine what satisfaction can be gotten from throwing a pie into someone's face.
    -- Emma Thompson

    #Pie #Satisfaction #Faces

  • I just clipped 2 articles from a current magazine. One is a diet guaranteed to drop 5 pounds off my body in a weekend. The other is a recipe for a 6 minute pecan pie.
    -- Erma Bombeck

    #Weekend #Pie #Pecans

  • The best of all physiciansIs apple pie and cheese!
    -- Eugene Field

    #Apples #Pie #Apple Pie

  • American Pie' was a big movie for me. No one knew it at the time, but it allowed me to be offered such movies as 'Like Mike' and 'New York Minute' with the Olsen twins
    -- Eugene Levy

    #New York #Pie #Twins

  • It doesn't matter what people call you unless they call you pigeon pie and eat you up.
    -- Evelyn Waugh

    #Pie #People #Matter

  • You shouldn't go around the world behaving ruthlessly when you don't have to. Sometimes you do have to. There is only so much pie to go around. If you're going to take more than your fair share of pie, as socialists would look at it, then someone else is not getting his. That means you've got to take it away from them.
    -- Felix Dennis

    #Mean #Pie #Looks

  • It's kind of a tradition that you get a rookie, put him in the middle, wrap your arms and legs around him, then douse him with everything you can get a hold of - shaving cream, ketchup, mustard, everything. It's kind of like a pie in the face after a guy is successful.
    -- Gary Carter

    #Successful #Pie #Guy

  • I don't enjoy eating humble pie.
    -- Geoffrey Zakarian

    #Humble #Pie #Eating

  • My mother's blueberry pie from scratch was amazing. I still make it today.
    -- Geoffrey Zakarian

    #Mother #Pie #Scratches

  • Almost everything that I behold in this wonderful country bears traces of improvement and reform - everything except Pie.
    -- George Augustus Henry Sala

    #Country #Pie #Reform

  • Men who leave their money to be distributed by others are pie-faced mutts,
    -- George Eastman

    #Men #Pie #Mutts

  • And the bigger the fall, the bigger the joke. It would be better fun to throw a custard pie at a bishop than at a curate.
    -- George Orwell

    #Fun #Fall #Pie

  • The chief requisite for the making of a good chicken pie is chicken; no amount of culinary legerdemain can make up for the lack of chicken. In the same way, the chief requisite for the history of science is intimate scientific knowledge; no amount of philosophic legerdemain can make up for its absence.
    -- George Sarton

    #Pie #Way #Absence

  • We ought to make the pie higher.
    -- George W. Bush

    #Pie #Higher

  • Pessimism is as American as apple pie - frozen apple pie with a slice of processed cheese.
    -- George Will

    #Apples #Pie #Cheesy

  • Most of the Womens Libbers I knew really didnt want to have a piece of the mens pie. They thought that pie was kind of poisonous, toxic, really full of weapons, poison gases, all kinds of mean junk we didnt even want a slice of.
    -- Grace Paley

    #Mean #Pie #Junk

  • May your stuffing be tasty May your turkey plump, May your potatoes and gravy Have nary a lump. May your yams be delicious And your pies take the prize, And may your Thanksgiving dinner Stay off your thighs!
    -- Grandpa Jones

    #Thanksgiving #Pie #Yams

  • From the clayey soil of northern Wyoming is mined bentonite, which is used as filler in candy, gum, and lipstick. We Americans are great on fillers, as if what we have, what we are, is not enough. We have a cultural tendency toward denial, but being affluent, we strangle ourselves with what we can buy. We gave only to look at the houses we build to see how we build *against* space, the way we drink against pain and loneliness. We fill up space as if it were a pie shell, with things whose opacity further obstructs our ability to see what is already there.
    -- Gretel Ehrlich

    #Pain #Loneliness #Pie

  • I would rather do really good French films than 'American Pie.
    -- Guillaume Canet

    #Pie #Film #American Pie

  • Violence against women is as American as apple pie. I know, not only as a legislator, but from personal experience.
    -- Gwen Moore

    #Apples #Pie #Violence

  • I say violence is necessary. It is as American as cherry pie.
    -- H. Rap Brown

    #Military #Pie #Violence

  • I say violence is necessary. Violence is a part of America's culture. It is as American as cherry pie. Americans taught the black people to be violent. We will use that violence to rid ourselves of oppression if necessary. We will be free, by any means necessary.
    -- H. Rap Brown

    #Mean #America #Pie

  • Since the 1980s, we have given the rich a bigger slice of our pie in the belief that they would create more wealth, making the pie bigger than otherwise possible in the long run. The rich got the bigger slice of the pie all right, but they have actually reduced the pace at which the pie is growing.
    -- Ha-Joon Chang

    #Running #Pie #Long

  • The man for me is the cherry on the pie. But I'm the pie and my pie is good all by itself. Even if I don't have a cherry.
    -- Halle Berry

    #Relationship #Men #Pie

  • Few people know this about me, but I love baking pies.
    -- Hilary Swank

    #Pie #People #Baking

  • Those of you who come in with me now will receive a big piece of the pie. Those of you who delay, and commit yourselves later, will receive a smaller piece of pie. Those of you who don't come in at all will receive - Good Government!
    -- Huey Long

    #Government #Pie #Delay

  • Trying to make things work in government is sometimes like trying to sew a button on a custard pie.
    -- Hyman Rickover

    #Work #Government #Pie

  • Kid 1: *examining my gorgeous strawberry and blueberry pies*: Wow, Mom, your pies don’t look awful this time. Me (Ilona): ... ~A little later~ Kid 2: *wandering into the kitchen* Kid 1: Hey, you’ve got to see these pies. *opening the stove* Kid 2: Wow. They are not ugly this time. Kid 1: I know, right?
    -- Ilona Andrews

    #Mom #Kids #Pie

  • If you come back to me, I'll never leave you", I whispered into the furry ear. "I'll make you all the pies you could ever eat.
    -- Ilona Andrews

    #Pie #Ears #Come Back To Me

  • Is that a lion with horns and a pitchfork?" "Yep." "Is he carrying the moon on his pitchfork?" "Nope it's a pie.
    -- Ilona Andrews

    #Moon #Pie #Lions

  • I get my fingers in all our pies. Before you know it, your little fingers including all your toes are in all the pies.
    -- Imelda Marcos

    #Pie #Littles #Toes

  • The mode of reconciling the promise of ever-increasing reward for the cadres and the demands of the working classes for a quid pro quo for their loyalty to the state was to offer the latter a small piece of the pie.
    -- Immanuel Wallerstein

    #Loyalty #Pie #Class

  • Things that really matter are the things that gold can't buy, so let's have another cup o' coffee and let's have another piece o' pie.
    -- Irving Berlin

    #Coffee #Food #Pie

  • --

  • Simple,' Tummeler replied.' Blueberries is one of the great forces o'good in the world.' How do you figure that?' said Charles. Well,' said Tummeler, 'have you ever seen a troll, or a Wendigo, or,' he shuddered, 'a Shadow-Born ever eating a blueberry pie?' No,' Charles admitted. There y'go,' said Tummeler. It's cause they can't stand the goodness in it.' Can't argue with you there,' said Charles. Foods is good and evil, just like people, or badgers, or even scowlers.' Evil food?' said Charles. Parsnips,' said Tummeler, 'Them's as evil as they come.
    -- James A. Owen

    #Simple #Pie #People

  • Side note to parents: Anyone who thinks 'Dude, Where's My Car' is more appropriate for children than 'American Pie' because it obtained a PG-13 rating needs to stop trusting the MPAA.
    -- James Berardinelli

    #Children #Thinking #Pie

  • Trying to make the presidency work these days is like trying to sew buttons on a custard pie.
    -- James David Barber

    #Pie #Trying #Buttons

  • Good apple pies are a considerable part of our domestic happiness.
    -- Jane Austen

    #Apples #Pie #Dessert

  • Excuse me?" I said, palms down on the Formica tabletop. "Coffee? I thought we came here for pie." "I don't eat the kind of pie they serve here." I felt a flash of heat go through my stomach. I knew firsthand the kind of pie Ranger liked.
    -- Janet Evanovich

    #Coffee #Pie #Heat

  • Well, I'm proud to say American Pie was the kind of crazy, gross-out film that guys thought was the greatest.
    -- Jason Biggs

    #Crazy #Pie #Guy

  • In order for American Pie to have worked, you have to have a character who, even while he is humping a pie, the audience still likes
    -- Jason Biggs

    #Character #Order #Pie

  • I've heard every pie joke in the book. I'm still waiting for an original one.
    -- Jason Biggs

    #Book #Pie #Waiting