Happy Divorce Quotes:

Live with the objective of being happy.

- Anne Frank

topic: Inspirational Diversity, Inspirational Stress Relief, Stress Relief, Life And Happiness, Joy And Happiness

When two people decide to get a divorce, it isn't a sign that they 'don't understand' one another, but a sign that they have, at last, begun to.

- Helen Rowland

source: Irvin S. Cobb, Mary Roberts Rinehart, Helen Rowland, Richard Saunders (2017). “We Should All Be So Feminine: We Should All Be a Feminist: We Should All Be Feminists”, p.70, Lulu.com

topic: Marriage, Single, Divorce, Inspirational Divorce, Parents Divorce

Many a woman would get a divorce if she could do it without making her husband happy.

- Evan Esar

topic: Husband, Divorce, After Divorce, Getting A Divorce, Going Through Divorce

Better to have loved and lost than to live with regret.

- Big Pun

topic: Regret, Lost, Loved And Lost, Humorous Valentine, St Valentine

Divorce isn't such a tragedy. A tragedy's staying in an unhappy marriage, teaching your children the wrong things about love. Nobody ever died of divorce.

- Jennifer Weiner

source: Jennifer Weiner (2010). “Fly Away Home”, p.362, Simon and Schuster

topic: Funny, Children, Teaching, Marriage And Divorce, Marriage Divorce

Thank God you can flee, can escape from that massy five-foot-thick maggot-cheesy solidarity which overlays the earth, in which men and women in couples are ranked like ninepins.

- William Faulkner

source: William Faulkner (1951). “Absalom, Absalom!”

topic: Couple, Divorce, Men, After Divorce, Happy Divorce

We all live with the objective of being happy; our lives are all different and yet the same.

- Anne Frank

source: 1944 Diary entry, 6 Jul.

topic: Happiness, Happy, Soulmate, Inspirational Diversity, Just Be Happy

Alimony - the ransom that the happy pay to the devil.

- H. L. Mencken

source: A Little Book in C Major ch. 6 (1916)

topic: Marriage, Devil, Ransom, Marriage And Divorce, Alimony

My mother always said don't marry for money, divorce for money.

- Wendy Liebman

topic: Mother, Divorce, Said, Happy Divorce

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

- Henny Youngman

topic: Love, Marriage, Secret, Husband To Be, Marriage Advice For Newlyweds

Ah, yes, divorce... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet.

- Robin Williams

topic: Single, Money, Rip, Marriage And Divorce, Marriage Divorce

What counts in making a happy marriage is not so much how compatible you are but how you deal with incompatibility.

- Leo Tolstoy

topic: Relationship, Marriage, Wedding, Marriage Advice, Marriage And Love Inspirational

Don't marry the person you think you can live with; marry only the individual you think you can't live without.

- James Dobson

topic: Love, Relationship, Marriage, Marriage Advice For Newlyweds, Great Marriage

Divorce lawyers stoke anger and fear in their clients, knowing that as long as the conflicts remain unresolved the revenue stream will keep flowing.

- Craig Ferguson

topic: Fear, Divorce, Knowing, Divorce Lawyers, Anger And Fear

In Palm Springs, they think homelessness is caused by bad divorce lawyers.

- Garry Trudeau

topic: Spring, Divorce, Thinking, Palm Springs, Divorce Lawyers

I can't get divorced because I'm a Catholic. Catholics don't get divorced. They stay together through anger and hatred and festering misery, just like God intended.

- Lenny Clarke

topic: Funny, Divorce, Hatred, Festering, Funny Divorce

In every marriage more than a week old, there are grounds for divorce. The trick is to find, and continue to find, grounds for marriage.

- Robert Anderson

topic: Love, Inspirational, Anniversary, Husband To Be, Amputation

I do not consider divorce an evil by any means. It is just as much a refuge for women married to brutal men as Canada was to the slaves of brutal masters.

- Susan B. Anthony

topic: Mean, Divorce, Men, Inspirational Divorce, Divorce Lawyers

A divorce is like an amputation: you survive it, but there's less of you.

- Margaret Atwood

topic: Broken Heart, Lost Love, Divorce, Amputation, Marriage And Divorce

The possibility of divorce renders both marriage partners stricter in their observance of the duties they owe to each other. Divorces help to improve morals and to increase the population.

- Denis Diderot

source: Denis Diderot (1966). “Selected Writings”, New York : Macmillan

topic: Divorce, Population, Literature, Marriage And Divorce, Marriage Divorce

Getting divorced just because you don't love a man is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.

- Zsa Zsa Gabor

source: "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

topic: Love, Inspirational, Life, Marriage And Divorce, Marriage Divorce

Nowadays love is a matter of chance, matrimony a matter of money and divorce a matter of course.

- Helen Rowland

topic: Love, Relationship, Money, Marriage And Divorce, Marriage Divorce

A lawyer is never entirely comfortable with a friendly divorce, anymore than a good mortician wants to finish his job and then have the patient sit up on the table.

- Jean Kerr

source: Jean Kerr (1965). “Mary, Mary”, p.33, Dramatists Play Service Inc

topic: Jobs, Divorce, Friendly, Morticians, Divorce Lawyers

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.

- Mignon McLaughlin

source: Mignon McLaughlin (2014). “Aperçus: The Aphorisms of Mignon McLaughlin”, p.32, BookBaby

topic: Love, Relationship, Anniversary, Husband Love, Husband To Be

If you made a list of reasons why any couple got married, and another list of the reasons for their divorce, you'd have a hell of a lot of overlapping.

- Mignon McLaughlin

source: Mignon McLaughlin (2014). “Aperçus: The Aphorisms of Mignon McLaughlin”, p.24, BookBaby

topic: Love, Anniversary, Marriage, Husband To Be, Marriage And Divorce

Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of all growths. No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century.

- Mark Twain

topic: Love, Marriage, Wedding, Marriage Advice For Newlyweds, Marriage And Love Inspirational

Americans, who make more of marrying for love than any other people, also break up more of their marriages, but the figure reflects not so much the failure of love as the determination of people not to live without it.

- Morton Hunt

topic: Marriage, Breakup, Determination, Marriage Divorce, Moving On After Breakup

If divorce has increased by one thousand percent, don't blame the women's movement. Blame the obsolete sex roles on which our marriages were based.

- Betty Friedan

topic: Sex, Divorce, Justice, Marriage Divorce, Feminine Mystique

Many divorces are not really the result of irreparable injury but involve, instead, a desire on the part of the man or woman to shatter the setup, start out from scratch alone, and make life work for them all over again. They want the risk of disaster, want to touch bottom, see where bottom is, and, coming up, to breathe the air with relief and relish again.

- Edward Hoagland

source: Edward Hoagland (1995). “The Tugman's Passage”

topic: Life, Divorce, Men, Relish, Irreparable

Divorce these days is a religious vow, as if the proper offspring of marriage.

- Tertullian

topic: Religious, Divorce, Vow, Marriage Divorce, Religious Love

Bad divorce?" Hardy asked, his gaze falling to my hands. I realized I was clutching my purse in a death grip. “No, the divorce was great,” I said. “It was the marriage that sucked.

- Lisa Kleypas

topic: Fall, Divorce, Hands, Happy Divorce

One advantage of marriage is that, when you fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with you, it keeps you together until you fall in again.

- Judith Viorst

source: Judith Viorst (1987). “Love and Guilt and the Meaning of Life, Etc.”, Fireside

topic: Love, Marriage, Fall, Husband To Be, Marriage Advice

My husband and I have never considered divorce... murder sometimes, but never divorce.

- Joyce Brothers

topic: Marriage, Husband, Divorce, Marriage And Divorce, Marriage Divorce

Any woman who votes for no-fault divorce is like a turkey voting for Thanksgiving.

- Pat Robertson

topic: Divorce, Turkeys, Voting, After Divorce, Happy Divorce

It was one of those ridiculous arrangements that couples make when they are separating, but before they are divorced - when they still imagine that children and property can be shared with more magnanimity than recrimination.

- John Irving

topic: Children, Couple, Divorce, Funny Divorce, Happy Divorce

Half of all marriages end in divorce- and then there are the really unhappy ones.

- Joan Rivers

topic: Breakup, Divorce, Unhappy, Marriage And Divorce, Marriage Divorce

Staying married may have long-term benefits. You can elicit much more sympathy from friends over a bad marriage than you ever can from a good divorce.

- P. J. O'Rourke

source: P. J. O'Rourke (2007). “Modern Manners: An Etiquette Book for Rude People”, p.122, Grove/Atlantic, Inc.

topic: Marriage, Sympathy, Divorce, Marriage And Divorce, Marriage Divorce

Divorce is the price people play for playing with matches.

- Evan Esar

topic: Divorce, Play, People, Marriage And Divorce, Marriage Divorce

Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and give her a house.

- Lewis Grizzard

topic: Funny, Marriage, Hilarious, Getting Married, Good Sex

I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always

- Red Skelton

topic: Inspiration, Names, Missing, Marriage Humor, Marriage Jokes

A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers.

- Ruth Graham

source: Ruth Bell Graham, Gigi Tchividjian (2009). “A Quiet Knowing”, p.42, Thomas Nelson Inc

topic: Love, Friendship, Family, Husband To Be, Husband Wife

She cried, and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook.

- Tommy Manville

topic: Judging, Tears, Marriage And Divorce, Marriage Divorce, Funny Divorce

Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.

- Groucho Marx

topic: Funny, Sarcastic, Crazy, Marriage And Divorce, Marriage Divorce

The happiest time of anyone's life is just after the first divorce.

- John Kenneth Galbraith

topic: Divorce, Firsts, Life Is, Marriage And Divorce, Marriage Divorce

Don't smother each other. No one can grow in the shade.

- Leo Buscaglia

topic: Love, Relationship, Marriage, Great Marriage, Happy Relationship

In our family we don't divorce our men - we bury them.

- Ruth Gordon

topic: Divorce, Men, Our Family, Funny Divorce, Happy Divorce

Asking the legal system to resolve divorce is like asking a boxing coach to be our marriage counselor.

- Warren Farrell

topic: Divorce, Boxing, Legal System, Marriage And Divorce, Marriage Divorce

Divorce is an embarrassing public admission of defeat.

- Tracy Letts

source: Tracy Letts (2008). “August: Osage County (TCG Edition)”, p.78, Theatre Communications Group

topic: Divorce, Defeat, Embarrassing, Inspirational Divorce, After Divorce

A divorce lawyer is a chameleon with a law book.

- Marvin Mitchelson

topic: Book, Divorce, Law, Law Books, Divorce Lawyers

Divorce is the psychological equivalent of a triple coronary bypass.

- Mary Blakely

source: Mary Kay Blakely (1995). “American Mom: Motherhood, Politics, and Humble Pie”, p.125, Simon and Schuster

topic: Divorce, Bypass, Psychological, Marriage And Divorce, Marriage Divorce