Great Beer Quotes:

The worst thing about some men is that when they are not drunk they are sober.

- William Butler Yeats

topic: Food, Drinking, Men, Alcoholism, Irish Beer

Homer no function beer well without.

- Matt Groening

topic: Beer, Ale, Funny Simpsons, Drinking Beer, Funniest Simpsons

A woman is like beer. They look good, they smell good, and you'd step over your own mother just to get one!

- Matt Groening

topic: Mother, Beer, Smell, Drinkers, Drinking Funny

Brewers enjoy working to make beer as much as drinking beer instead of working.

- Hal Foster

topic: Drinking, Beer, Enjoy, Craft Beer, Funny Beer Drinking

Let no man thirst for good beer.

- Samuel Adams

topic: Beer, Men, Thirst, Brewing, Funny Beer

Many battles have been fought and won by soldiers nourished on beer.

- Frederick The Great

topic: Beer, Soldier, Battle, Prussia, Drinking Cheers

Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer.

- Henry Lawson

topic: Party, Drinking, Beer, Irish Beer, Brewing

They who drink beer will think beer.

- Washington Irving

topic: Funny, Witty, Drinking, Drinkers, Whiskey Drinking

I drink to make other people interesting.

- George Jean Nathan

source: George Jean Nathan, Charles Angoff (1998). “The World of George Jean Nathan: Essays, Reviews, & Commentary”, Hal Leonard Corporation

topic: Drinking, People, Interesting, Alcoholism, Liquor Funny

When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. Sooooo, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!

- Brian O'Rourke

topic: Food, Fall, Drinking, Irish Beer, Irish Drinking

In a study, scientists report that drinking beer can be good for the liver. I'm sorry, did I say 'scientists'? I meant Irish people.

- Tina Fey

topic: Sorry, Drinking, Beer, Irish Beer, Funny Beer

Why is American beer served cold? So you can tell it from urine.

- Dave Moulton

topic: Beer, Cold, Drinking Beer, Drinking Whiskey, Cold Beer

Who cares how time advances? I am drinking ale today.

- Edgar Allan Poe

topic: Drinking, Beer, Who Cares, Ale, Drinking Alcohol

Make sure that the beer - four pints a week - goes to the troops under fire before any of the parties in the rear get a drop.

- Winston Churchill

topic: Party, Beer, Fire, Brewing, Craft Beer

Beer, if drank with moderation, softens the temper, cheers the spirit, and promotes health.

- Thomas Jefferson

topic: Cheer, Drinking, Beer, Brewing, Malt

There is an ancient Celtic axiom that says 'Good people drink good beer.' Which is true, then as now. Just look around you in any public barroom and you will quickly see: Bad people drink bad beer. Think about it.

- Hunter S. Thompson

topic: Beer, Thinking, People, Brewing, Malt

Fill with mingled cream and amber, I will drain that glass again. Such hilarious visions clamber Through the chamber of my brain — Quaintest thoughts — queerest fancies Come to life and fade away; What care I how time advances? I am drinking ale today.

- Edgar Allan Poe

topic: Drinking, Glasses, Alcohol, Ale, Brewing

No soldier can fight unless he is properly fed on beef and beer.

- John Churchill, 1st Duke of Marlborough

topic: Drinking, Fighting, Beer, Brewing, Liquor Funny

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.

- Wilhelm II

topic: Beer, Love Is, Giving, Irish Beer, Irish Drinking

Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.

- Dave Barry

topic: Drinking, Book, Beer, Ale, Funny Sarcastic

You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer.

- Frank Zappa

topic: Funny, Country, Football, Irish Beer, Brewing

To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a "support group". Salvation in a can!

- Leo Durocher

topic: Beer, Support, Six Packs, Support Groups, Whiskey Drinking

I recommend...bread, meat, vegetables, and beer.

- Sophocles

topic: Beer, Vegetables, Bread, Craft Beer, Beer Drinking

Most people hate the taste of beer - to begin with. It is, however, a prejudice that many people have been able to overcome.

- Winston Churchill

topic: Hate, Beer, People, Beer And Love, Beer Drinkers

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.

- Benjamin Franklin

topic: Love, Inspirational, Funny, Ale, Lager

Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink.

- Nancy Astor

topic: Husband, Alcohol, Poison, Your Husband, Wives And Mothers

An oppressive government is more to be feared than a tiger.

- Confucius

topic: Philosophical, Government, Profound, Oppressive Governments, Superior Man

He who loves not women, wine, and song Remains a fool his whole life long.

- Martin Luther

source: "Luther's Works: Table talk".

topic: Love, Life, Song, Drinkers, Women And Wine

God has a brown voice, as soft and full as beer.

- Anne Sexton

topic: Beer, Voice, Squash, Ale, Drinks And Love

In my opinion, most of the great men of the past were only there for the beer - the wealth, prestige and grandeur that went with the power.

- A. J. P. Taylor

topic: Beer, Past, Men, Grandeur, Funny Beer

Beer's intellectual. What a shame so many idiots drink it.

- Ray Bradbury

topic: Drinking, Beer, Intellectual, Drinking Beer, Beer And Love

When I die, I want to decompose in a barrel of porter and have it served in all the pubs in Dublin. I wonder would they know it was me?

- J. P. Donleavy

source: Ginger Man (1955) ch. 31

topic: Beer, Dublin, Want, Irish Beer, Irish Drinking

Instead of water we got here a draught of beer, a lumberer's drink, which would acclimate and naturalize a man at once,-which would make him see green, and, if he slept, dream that he heard the wind sough among the pines.

- Henry David Thoreau

source: Henry David Thoreau (2014). “The Maine Woods (Annotated Edition)”, p.24, Jazzybee Verlag

topic: Dream, Beer, Men, Draught, Drinking Cheers

stay with the beer. beer is continuous blood. a continuous lover.

- Charles Bukowski

topic: Drinking, Beer, Blood, Drinks And Love, Beer And Love

The roots and herbes beaten and put into new ale or beer and daily drunk, cleareth, strengtheneth and quickeneth the sight of the eyes.

- Nicholas Culpeper

topic: Eye, Beer, Roots, Ale, Craft Beer

Now son, you don’t want to drink beer. That’s for Daddies, and kids with fake IDs.

- Homer

topic: Kids, Beer, Son, Drinking Beer, Great Beer

Whoever drinks beer, he is quick to sleep; whoever sleeps long, does not sin; whoever does not sin, enters Heaven! Thus, let us drink beer!

- Martin Luther

topic: Funny, Drinking, Sleep, Drinkers, Funny Drinking

Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.

- W. C. Fields

topic: Drinking, Beer, Reality, Drinking Beer, Drinking Funny

I've only been in love with a beer bottle and a mirror.

- Sid Vicious

topic: Love, Beer, Mirrors, Brewing, Light Beer

Payday came and with it beer

- Rudyard Kipling

topic: Beer, Payday, Great Beer, Great Drinking

I fear the man who drinks water and so remembers this morning what the rest of us said last night

- Benjamin Franklin

topic: Morning, Beer, Night, Drinkers, Whiskey Drinking

Beer: Helping ugly people have sex since 3000 B. C.

- W. C. Fields

topic: Sex, Beer, People, Ugly People, Great Beer

A God in the hand is worth two in the bush.

- Frederick Buechner

source: Frederick Buechner (2009). “Beyond Words: Daily Readings in the ABC's of Faith”, p.2, Zondervan

topic: Faith, Latin, Hands, Spanish Proverb, Finnish

The letters in 'Brace Beemer' can be arranged to spell 'Embrace Beer.'

- Dave Barry

topic: Drinking, Beer, Letters, Craft Beer, Great Beer

A drink a day keeps the shrink away.

- Edward Abbey

source: Edward Abbey, R. Crumb (1985). “The Monkey Wrench Gang”, p.127, Dream Garden Press

topic: Drinking, Beer, Drunk, Funny Drinking, Bars Drinking

Beer is made by men, wine by God.

- Martin Luther

topic: Wine, Beer, Men, Vineyards, Best Wine

Nothing ever tasted better than a cold beer on a beautiful afternoon with nothing to look forward to than more of the same.

- Hugh Hood

topic: Beautiful, Beer, Looks, Malt, Cold Beer

We old folks have to find our cushions and pillows in our tankards. Strong beer is the milk of the old.

- Martin Luther

topic: Strong, Beer, Milk, Brewing, Drinking Beer

I am a firm believer in the people. If given the truth, they can be depended upon to meet any national crisis. The great point is to bring them the real facts.

- Abraham Lincoln

topic: Inspirational, Wisdom, Truth, Irish Beer, Drinkers