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“All the media and the politicians ever talk about is things that separate us, things that make us different from one another”
-- George Carlin
#Media #Different #Politician
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“The whole idea of the pursuit of goods and possessions has completely corrupted the human experience, along with religion, which I think limits the intellect.”
-- George Carlin
#Thinking #Ideas #Limits
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“Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.”
-- George Carlin
#Nature #Philosophy #Stupid
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“One of the effects it [cocaine] had on my personality - my moods, my behaviors - was that it inhibited me a lot. It kind of took possibilities out of my world, and made the focus of things very narrow.”
-- George Carlin
#Focus #Personality #World
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“Don’t just teach your children to read… Teach them to question what they read. Teach them to question everything.”
-- George Carlin
#Faith #Children #Learning
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“Voting is a meaningless exercise. I'm not going to waste my time with it. These parties, these politicians are given to us as a way of making us feel we have freedom of choice. But we don't. Everything is done to you in this country.”
-- George Carlin
#Country #Party #Exercise
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“Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.”
-- George Carlin
#Funny #Life #Witty
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“Obviously, there are people who constrict themselves and build walls around themselves, whether it's from a moral standpoint or a patriotic standpoint, or just plain old conformity, and who therefore live in those little prisons, and when things breach those walls, it's shocking for them.”
-- George Carlin
#Wall #Patriotic #People
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“Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.”
-- George Carlin
#Cynical #Idealist #Disappointed
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“Language is a tool for concealing the truth. If we could read each other's minds, this would be a horror show.”
-- George Carlin
#Mind #Would Be #Tools
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“Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.”
-- George Carlin
#Inspirational #Life #Music
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“Catholic school gave me the tools to reject the very religion they wanted me to have. They taught me how to think for myself and to be independent.”
-- George Carlin
#School #Independent #Thinking
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“Here’s a bumper sticker I’d like to see: “We are the proud parents of a child who’s self-esteem is sufficient that he doesn’t need us promoting his minor scholastic achievements on the back of our car.”
-- George Carlin
#Funny #Sarcastic #Witty
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“Religion is a self-conferred intellectual decision; it's not something you get at birth and is unchangeable. You're collusive with the religion when you accept it; you have a choice.”
-- George Carlin
#Self #Choices #Decision
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“Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?”
-- George Carlin
#Inspirational #Funny #Life
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“I think religion is very anti-man. I think it's a terrible distortion and exploitation of a very natural urge every human has - to be rejoined with the one somehow, to become a part of the universe. Once the high priests and the traders took over, we were lost as a species.”
-- George Carlin
#Men #Thinking #Natural
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“Regarding the fitness craze: America has lost its soul; now it's trying to save its body.”
-- George Carlin
#Fitness #America #Soul
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“Everybody in America is a part of this big herd of cattle being led to the marketplace, not to be sold, which is usual with cattle, but to do the buying. And everyone is branded. You see the brands - Nike, Puma, Coke - all over their bodies. Pretty soon you'll go to a family and say, "$100,000 if we can tattoo Pepsi on your child's forehead, and we'll have it removed when he's twenty-one. A hundred grand."”
-- George Carlin
#Tattoo #Nike #Children
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“Trying to be happy by accumulating possessions is like trying to satisfy hunger by taping sandwiches all over your body”
-- George Carlin
#Fun #Over You #Trying
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“An entertainer is someone who pleases others, and an artist tries to please himself. An artist is on a journey: they don't know where they're going, what is going to happen, but they know they are not there yet, and there is some continuity and growth. I think of myself as an entertainer: I'm a performing entertainer, I'm a stand-up comic. But there's an artist at work here, too. One who interprets his world through his own filter.”
-- George Carlin
#Artist #Journey #Thinking
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“Property is theft. Nobody "owns" anything. When you die, it all stays here.”
-- George Carlin
#Stupid #People #Theft
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“I like my jokes to be built on a foundation of ideas, or at least smart observations.”
-- George Carlin
#Smart #Ideas #Foundation
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“I don't believe there's any problem in this country, no matter how tough it is, that Americans, when they roll up their sleeves, can't completely ignore.”
-- George Carlin
#Country #Believe #Matter
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“The safest place to be during an earthquake would be in a stationary store.”
-- George Carlin
#Earthquakes #Would Be #Stores
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“Weather forecast for tonight: dark.”
-- George Carlin
#Sarcastic #Laughter #Smart
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“Israeli murderers are called "commandos," Arab commandos are called "terrorists."”
-- George Carlin
#Humorous #Terrorist #Murderer
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“What I became a comedian for was to get my art out. To get some of these feelings and things I had on my chest out. I don't care if people believe them, listen to them, change their ways, or think, or any of that kind of crap. I'm interested in showing off. I'm the same kid from sixth grade who stood up and said "watch this."”
-- George Carlin
#Art #Believe #Kids
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“If churches want to play the game of politics, let them pay admission like everyone else.”
-- George Carlin
#Games #Play #Church
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“Broadway isn't a very big career move. There's no money in it and it doesn't mean anything to your career. It's just a nice little jewel in the crown.”
-- George Carlin
#Nice #Moving #Mean
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“Conservatives say if you don't give the rich more money, they will lose their incentive to invest. As for the poor, they tell us they've lost all incentive because we've given them too much money.”
-- George Carlin
#Giving #Political #Too Much
