
Retirement is the ugliest word in the language.
topic: Retirement, Work, Age, Inspirational Retirement, Retirement Card
Retire? I'm going to stay in show business until I'm the only one left
topic: Aging, Retiring, Shows, Inspirational Retirement, Funny Retirement
When a man retires, his wife gets twice the husband but only half the income.
topic: Husband, Men, Wife, Inspirational Retirement, Retired Teacher
A retired husband is often a wife's full-time job.
topic: Jobs, Husband, Wife, Inspirational Retirement, Funny Retirement
I'm now as free as the breeze - with roughly the same income.
topic: Teacher, Retirement, Income, Funny Retirement, Retirement Humor
Retirement kills more people than hard work ever did.
topic: Retirement, Hard Work, People, Inspirational Retirement, Retirement Farewell
topic: Men, Age, Matter, Inspirational Retirement, Retirement Card
The question isn't at what age I want to retire, it's at what income.
topic: Sports, Age, Income, Inspirational Retirement, Funny Retirement
Eating's going to be a whole new ball game. I may even have to buy a new pair of trousers.
topic: Retirement, Games, Balls, Retirement Wishes
Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life.
source: In Observer 15 Apr. 1923
topic: Birthday, Would Be, Littles, Funny Retirement, Wise Birthday
topic: Happiness, Appreciation, Retirement, Always Happy, Joy Happiness
For retirement brings repose, and repose allows a kindly judgment of all things.
topic: Retirement, Funny Retirement, Judgment, Inspirational Retirement, Retirement Wishes
If you drink don't drive. Don't even putt.
source: "Famous drinkers" by Rob Parker, www.theguardian.com. April 18, 2004.
topic: Drinking, Book, Beer, Funny Sarcastic, Inspirational Golf
As in all successful ventures, the foundation of a good retirement is planning.
topic: Inspirational, Retirement, Successful, Inspirational Retirement, Retirement Humor
topic: Retirement, Party, Way, Colonels, Funny Retirement
topic: Retirement, People, Merit, Funny Retirement, Retirement Wishes
Golf is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness.
topic: Sports, Retirement, Golf, Inspirational Golf, Funny Retirement
It is better to live rich than to die rich.
topic: Wisdom, Funny Retirement, Wealth, Retirement Card, Retirement Party
The real reason your pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing at you.
topic: Retirement, Real, Golf, Funny Golf, Funny Golfing
When you retire, you switch bosses - from the one who hired you to the one who married you.
topic: Retirement, Boss, Age, Funny Retirement, Retirement Card
You're only young once, but you can be immature forever.
topic: Life, Happy Birthday, Happiness, Humorous Birthday, Mature And Immature
topic: Wine, Old Friends, Age, Best Wine, Old Wine
source: Diary entry, April 15, 1836.
topic: Country, Retirement, Long, Funny Retirement, Retirement Homes
source: Voltaire (1949). “The portable Voltaire”
topic: Life, Retirement, Age, Inspirational Age, Funny Retirement
How blest is he who crowns in shades like these A youth of labour with an age of ease!
source: 'The Deserted Village' (1770) l. 99
topic: Retirement, Age, Crowns, Inspirational Retirement, Retirement Age
Don't act your age in retirement. Act like the inner young person you have always been.
topic: Teacher, Retirement, Age, Inspirational Retirement, Retirement Wishes
topic: Hilarious, Retirement, Ties, Stoops, Funny Retirement
There's one thing I always wanted to do before I quit... Retire!
source: "Fictional character: Captain Jeffrey Spaulding". "Animal Crackers", August 20, 1930.
topic: Retirement, Work, Age, Retired Teacher, Retirement Farewell
Retirement is wonderful. It's doing nothing without worrying about getting caught at it.
topic: Retirement, Worry, Age, Inspirational Retirement, Funny Retirement
Retirement: That's when you return from work one day and say, "Hi, Honey, I'm home - forever."
topic: Retirement, Home, Forever, Inspirational Retirement, Funny Retirement
I enjoy waking up and not having to go to work. So I do it three or four times a day.
topic: Success, Retirement, Age, Inspirational Retirement, Funny Retirement
Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache... unless you play golf.
topic: Inspirational, Retirement, Stress, Inspirational Retirement, Funny Retirement
Middle age is when work is a lot less fun and fun is a lot more work.
topic: Retirement, Fun, Age, Retirement Age, Retirement Card
A man can't retire his experience.
topic: Men, Experience, Retiring, Ciphers, Inspirational Retirement
topic: Teacher, Retirement, Numbers, Ciphers, Inspirational Retirement
Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose wives think they are out having fun.
topic: Funny, Retirement, Native American, Inspirational Golf, Motivational Golf
Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples.
topic: Funny, Witty, Teacher, Inspirational Retirement, Funny Retirement
Good teachers know how to bring out the best in students.
topic: Teacher, Literature, Students, Retirement Wishes, Teacher Appreciation
The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off.
topic: Retirement, Days Off, Trouble, Inspirational Retirement, Funny Retirement
The harder you work, the harder it is to surrender.
topic: Inspirational, Motivational, Basketball, Favorite Sports, Inspirational Commitment
Retired is being tired twice, I've thought, first tired of working, then tired of not.
topic: Teacher, Retirement, Tired, Funny Retirement, Retired Teacher